Ah, #queer community infighting. Lately I've been getting more interactions like this from some #cis gay folks who are falling for the #LGB anti- #trans propaganda. To paraphrase:
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me: I love that your life is good, that the activism work we've done has made it safe for you to exist and love the way you want, and you deserve respect for your identity and self-expression, and connections to the communities you feel a part of.
them: Yeah!
me: And other people deserve your respect for their identity and self-expression, and connections to the communities they feel a part of.
them: ...not like that!
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If some particular #LGBTQ+ folks don't feel that they are part of a greater community, then that's fine for them, they don't have to be.
But that respect goes both ways. You don't get to treat others as less deserving because their lives don't look like yours.
(edit: removed two sentences to make it clear I am not rejecting anyone; that's the whole point.)