Post #2225799

2026-03-02 04:56 UTC

"Lights on, nobody home." "Couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were printed on the heel." "Dumber than . . ." "a sackful of hammers", "a bag full of hair", "a suitcase full of rocks". "Three bricks shy of a load." "Elevator don't go all the way to the penthouse." "Not the sharpest tool in the shed." "Couldn't piss out a boat and hit water." "A real good dancer." "Short bus."

Replies (8)

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social 2026-03-02 05:07

This isn't a particularly good day, to be honest, but even on bad days, I marvel at our facility for using language.

Open ##2225800
@hyperreal@tilde.zone 2026-03-02 05:01

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social Humans value competence.

Open ##2225805
@bruce@darkmoon.social 2026-03-02 05:14

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social Dumber than a bag of dicks

Open ##2225848
@useravoiding@mastodon.social 2026-03-02 05:34

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social The car is going but there's no one behind the wheel. There's light in the attic but no ladder.

Open ##2225849
@jezhiggins@mastodon.me.uk 2026-03-02 06:06

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social "not dealing from a full deck" "doesn't know his arse from his elbow" "couldn't find his arse with both hands and a map"

Open ##2225850
@thirstybear@agilodon.social 2026-03-02 06:12

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social Track yourself down a copy of “Jackspeak” by Rick Jolly. I think you’ll enjoy it. 🙂

Open ##2225853
@fishidwardrobe@mastodon.me.uk 2026-03-02 09:47

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social foghorn leghorn is my go-to for this, too, but the UK "couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery" is worth something…

Open ##2225854
@markhburton@mstdn.social 2026-03-02 19:55

@GeePawHill@mastodon.social "thick as two short planks" (Northern English)

Open ##2225855