Cru (Guillotine’s Version)

in very exciting news, my thai chilis finally started sprouting and that was 98% of the reason I started a garden this year so HALLELUUUUUUUUUU

i’ve had this thing for as long as i can remember where i’m slightly bothered if my straw doesn’t match my drink/container so no test needed

coworker surprised me with house warming wine last night and they know what i am and it’s all pink errthang

i have had a very cavalier attitude about planting all of the suspicious unlabeled seeds i ordered off the internet this garden season

I kinda miss being neighbors with Max Talbot. Southside 2008 was wild. Southside 2026 is abysmal lmfao

watching this Netflix documentary about wrinkles the clown, um, hey, less people should have children.

yeurrrrr

learning my coworker reenacts ww2 battles: 🤠
for the wrong side: 😔

has anybody told the cup stacking as a sport community about autism yet

sometimes a lot will happen and you will be like “oh gorsh life is really life-ing!” then three more major unresolved things from twenty years ago will pop up again and like. what. okay?

nobody even asks daddy if he would like some sausages anymore

got fired from the sex hotline for asking a client if his hog wanted to find my truffles

throwing Molotov cocktails at Sam Altman’s house will not be a crime when I am president.

*eating a used fleshlight* dawg, cannoli’s taste so much better when they’re fresh

right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brother right about now funk soul brother check it out it now funk soul brot