Post #2393357
2026-05-10 07:42 UTC
Replies (25)
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@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social 2026-05-10 07:46
honestly, tech industry can sometimes be so depressing.
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@SnowyCA@social.vivaldi.net 2026-05-10 07:47
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social 🙄 And for only the Regular price of $529.00 * you too can own a chef's knife that can be bricked while carving your Sunday roast. * Easy payments of $6.99 a month for life due to the high interest rate.
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@dianea@lgbtqia.space 2026-05-10 07:51
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social something can you install Doom on it
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@kaspi@mstdn.social 2026-05-10 08:06
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social truly cutting edge technology
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@bms48@mastodon.social 2026-05-10 09:07
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social This has Salvador Dali's "Young Virgin Auto-Sodomized By Her Own Chastity" all over it. Yeah, that was about his sister, so arguably a form of horizontal reverse-Oedipal transference. https://modernart13068593.wordpress.com/2019/01/03/psychoanalysis-of-salvador-dali/
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@sjcooke66@mastodon.social 2026-05-10 09:15
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social So IoT has taken a low-tech object that we've had since the palaeolithic - an efficient, labour-saving, disposable cutting tool - and made it cost half a week's pay?
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@happyborg@fosstodon.org 2026-05-10 10:00
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social obscure reference.. in the film Harry is Here to Help (highly recommended) the old school friend Harry, recites a creepy poem by his buddy from school called The Knife and I wonder about the connection here :rofl:
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@MWT@toot.garden 2026-05-10 10:16
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social can you still chop veggies if you just don't update?
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@patsytheshark@mastodon.ie 2026-05-10 10:27
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social I am so confused - what is being updated? What does the knife do that is different than a regular knife and requires firmware?
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@arclight@oldbytes.space 2026-05-10 13:04
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social "Yo dawg, I heard you liked attack surfaces so I put an attack surface on your attack surface..."
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@nazokiyoubinbou@urusai.social 2026-05-10 14:15
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social Why is the whole blade chrome-plated??? I... don't think this knife is safe to use anyway... EDIT: Ok, got a look at the product page. Ok, first of all WOW at that price!!! What even the!!! Second of all, even if it claims to be high carbon steel, there's no way that isn't chrome plated... I'll die on this hill if I have to.
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@Ralph@hear-me.social 2026-05-10 14:40
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social And, the vibroknife is +1 against body armour, if I recall correctly.
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@TribeofMa@ohai.social 2026-05-10 16:22
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social 😭😢
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@Flop_Ysh@hostux.social 2026-05-10 17:31
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social but honestly how good does it work? Like on a pumpkin for instance. Does it need less sharpening?
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@kate@social.treehouse.systems 2026-05-10 17:34
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social who thought that this is a product the world needs...
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@ehproque@neopaquita.es 2026-05-10 17:40
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social one step closer to https://m.xkcd.com/293/
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@sgsax@mastodon.social 2026-05-10 17:40
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social Excuse me, I gotta find a table to flip
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@MaddieM4@raphus.social 2026-05-10 17:43
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social I know some wise guy is going to say "well it's a knife with electronics in it, so maybe firmware makes sense!" I'd like to head that off at the pass. If my Hitachi wand doesn't need firmware or updates thereof, neither does even the most ultrasonic of slicey diceys.
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@n1xnx@tilde.zone 2026-05-10 17:47
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social Firmware developer here. And I cook. Knives. Don't. Need. Firmware. If, for some reason you feel the need to have the knife vibrate while cutting up food, you only really need a little motor, a battery, and a switch - maybe a slide switch with several settings and some resistors. Nothing that couldn't have been made in the 1950's. Anything more is a result of failure to ask the "Should we do this?" question. I bet my $60 santoku handily outperforms that shiny toy, and won't be obsolete in half a century.
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@svavar@masto.svavar.com 2026-05-10 18:04
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social What does the firmware do?
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@jredlund@social.linux.pizza 2026-05-10 18:04
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social Knives are dangerous you know. It is good to know their whereabouts. And I am sure that when you turn it on, you have to listen to all the rules of safe knife use, along with all of the caveats from the company about not being responsible for unauthorized surgeries, murders, inexpert chicken dismembering, and missing human digits.
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@poetaster@mastodon.gamedev.place 2026-05-10 18:07
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social does it stick in the wall if thrown? Is it well balanced?
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@korenwolf@mendeddrum.org 2026-05-10 18:07
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social That's quality tech bollocks. I'll stick with my nice, regularly sharpened, knife collection
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@ColesStreetPothole@weatherishappening.network 2026-05-10 18:10
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social End-stage capitalism.
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@futurebird@sauropods.win 2026-05-10 18:13
@DM_Ronin@mstdn.social Listen I follow gadgets and I have never heard of a large ultrasonic knife like this. Let alone one that needed firmware. This isn't just silly I think it's likely deeply fraudulent.