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The Onion

Ring Launches Streaming  Service

HAWTHORNE, CA—Providing customers with an expansive and growing library of premium content, smart doorbell manufacturer Ring launched a new streaming service Wednesday. Company officials said Ring+,

The Onion

Congress Interrogates Fauci Over Origins Of Pie Brought To Cookout

WASHINGTON—Accusing the physician of not being straight with the American people, an often hostile Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee this week interrogated Anthony Fauci over the or

The Onion

Profits Soar As Taylor Farms Rebrands As Biological Weapons Manufacturer

The Onion

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Zendaya

With her roles in the current and upcoming blockbusters The Odyssey, Spider-Man: Brand New Day, and Dune: Part Three, Zendaya is having a banner year. The Onion sat down with the star to discuss what’

The Onion

Law Roach Asks Store Associate If She Has Tom Holland In Different Size

LOS ANGELES—Noting that the extra small available on the sales floor just wouldn’t work for his client, Zendaya’s stylist Law Roach reportedly asked a store associate Thursday if she had Tom Holland i

The Onion

‘I Was Once A Normal Little Boy Like You,’ Disney World Donald Duck Warns Terrified Child

ORLANDO, FL—In what eyewitnesses described as a deeply disturbing and totally unhinged interaction, a Disney World Donald Duck reportedly warned a terrified child Thursday that he was once a normal li

The Onion

Study: Majority Of Americans Would Benefit From Decreased Phone Use During Sex

WASHINGTON—Shedding light on the negative effects of excessive screen time, a new study from Georgetown University published Thursday found that most Americans would benefit from cutting down on phone

The Onion

‘That’s All I’m Saying,’ Repeats Man Who Keeps Saying More Stuff

The Onion

Tate Brothers Arrested In Florida

Influencers Andrew and Tristan Tate were arrested in Florida on rape and sex trafficking charges and now face potential extradition to the U.K. What do you think?