mysterious creacher
loves pink
kind of a crybaby
hugger of plushies
all growed up (but i’m baby)
i will :3 you
“you little shit” — @epsi@akko.wtf
Posts
@Axolotl1@gaygeek.social o i wanted to add i also get asked “what’s wrong” a lot when my face is neutral. i’ve been told im pretty deadpan and it’s frankly that just exerting that kind of control over my features consciously to make other people more comfortable is exhausting so ive stopped doing it. i still emote when i want to show emotion but i dont understand the need other people seem to have for me smiling or looking pleasantly at them all the time. im minding my business why can’t they mind theirs? u know?
coming back to ffxiv this past week has been hard bc i feel the weight of other people’s expectations of me still even though ive given up leading my fc and forked over the discord reigns.
ostensibly, ownership transferred to someone else when our owner had a lapse in sub and me coming back, nobody wants to “bother me” with the “burden” of running the fc (it’s not a burden when i’m allowed to do what i want but i’ve been tasked with being nice to every single new person they bring in and just accepting them and i simply do not trust people that quickly.) also one of the people taking over is someone i’ve never liked, but they said “love you” to me last night when i got done handing over the details & ownership for the discord and it made me feel so gross like.
you don’t know me. i’ve never liked you but i show you the base amount of respect but over and over again people act overly familiar and affectionate in game with me and i hate it.
idk if im just cranky or what but like…they wanna start recruiting people and growing the fc and that’s the antithesis of what i formed this fc on and it’s making me nauseous dealing with all of this.
there are people i like left there but my core group of friends up and left for aether dc after i stopped playing 2 years ago.
i dont get it this keeps happening to me - some types of people just feel way closer and more comfortable with me than i do with them and i feel like i cannot open up to them. and i dont even want to so like. aaaaaaaughhhh idk what to do im so conflicted
love that meme that’s like “yeah ofc everybody deserves love and respect dummy it comes for free with your humanity”
spring cleaning for websites is tedious lmfao i’m in a prison of my own design :’D