#microfiction
"A lot of you on earth appear to be submitting requests for help written by one of your 'AI' programs. If you want to do this, you don't have to submit the request at all! Just roll one of your six-sided dice and refer to the following table for the answer:

1: that doesn't make sense.
2: no.
3: please provide more information.
4: I understand, but that wouldn't help him.
5: we'd need a genetic scan of your grandparents.
6: roll again twice.