SO If you want to find a mate, focus first on just finding friends and finding you. Go to where people do things. Try a lot of different things. Join people who help at a hospice, join a group of birdwatchers, meet up with people who make birdhouses, whatever, get out try stuff. Go back to places where what they do fascinates you and fills you with joy or a sense of purpose. Make friends with women - not to "score", but just to be a friend Be friendly, be helpful, be reliable, be SAFE