Me riding my bike out, with the wind at my back: Ha ha! Fuck yeah! Yes!
Me riding back: Well, this fucking sucks. What the fuck.
Greg Knauss
@gknauss@mastodon.social
mastodon
4.6.0-nightly.2026-04-20
I blogged before rafeco@hachyderm.io.
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Joined October 06, 2016
Web:
E-Mail:
greg@eod.com
Posts
@gknauss@mastodon.social
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14h ago
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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1d ago
Passed an electric blue Corvette — the kind that tries hard to look like a Ferrari — on the freeway yesterday, with the license plate “CRYPTO”.
I’d tell you what the driver looked like, but you already know.
I’d tell you what the driver looked like, but you already know.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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3d ago
I recently bought a pack of CR2032 batteries, and it said they had a coating to dissuade kids from swallowing them.
Of course I licked one. They were basically daring me. No packaging gets away with calling _me_ chicken.
It was _really_ bitter.
They should include a warning or something.
Of course I licked one. They were basically daring me. No packaging gets away with calling _me_ chicken.
It was _really_ bitter.
They should include a warning or something.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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3d ago
I kind of admire members of the Trump administration. Every day, they do things that are so shameful, so embarrassing, that they’d cause a normal person to walk into the desert to be willingly picked apart by buzzards.
But, no, they just get right back on the horse and do it again.
But, no, they just get right back on the horse and do it again.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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4d ago
I’m an atheist, so the only parallel to the cosmological beatdown that the Pope is giving JD Vance is if science discovered a species of bacteria that looked exactly like me and repeatedly punched itself in the dick.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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5d ago
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 12, 2026
Me: If “awful” is bad and “awesome” is good, then “awless” must be the best thing ever!
Kid, 24, in town for the weekend: Moooom, dad’s doing the thing again.
Wife: I just ignore him.
Kid, 24, in town for the weekend: Moooom, dad’s doing the thing again.
Wife: I just ignore him.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 11, 2026
Just sharing this photo because it will make certain people incandescently angry.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 11, 2026
I’ve decided to combine Sloth and Gluttony into a new, much better sin called “Sluttony.”
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 08, 2026
People keep talking about impeachment or the 25th Amendment, but all you’d have to do to get rid of Trump is leave him in a room with a door that pushes open but is labeled “Pull”.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 07, 2026
Shout out to Gen X, and the existential dread of imminent nuclear apocalypse!
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 07, 2026
Bad software makes me frustrated, so — given the state of the industry — I am constantly in a state of blinding, white-hot rage.
Nothing fucking works.
Nothing fucking works.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 06, 2026
Can’t wait to see what Jake Tapper does when all his First Amendment tchotchkes are confiscated at the door.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 06, 2026
Maybe he thinks “the Fuckin’ Straight” is the actual name of the waterway?
Like, he pronounces it “f’hu-kin”?
Like, he pronounces it “f’hu-kin”?
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 06, 2026
If we were spider people, the crucifix would be an asterisk.
I promise I am not high.
I promise I am not high.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 05, 2026
Hell, using multiple exclamation points on a single sentence is grounds for impeachment as far as I’m concerned.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 04, 2026
[Twitching uneasily while scratching at my neck.]
You got any more of that people-working-together-towards-a-shared-goal-for-the-common-good?
You got any more of that people-working-together-towards-a-shared-goal-for-the-common-good?
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 04, 2026
Yes, it would be weird for the Joint Chiefs to frag the Secretary of Defense, but we live in weird times.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 03, 2026
Maybe it’s just me, but “collecting astrophage from the Petrova Line” sure sounds like a sex thing.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 02, 2026
Anybody dumb enough to give their loyalty to Donald Trump — much less expect any back in return — deserves that they get.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 02, 2026
I am overjoyed at the launch of the Aretmis II, both because its crew are safe and extending the boundaries of science, and because we don’t have to have a national memorial service led by Donald Trump, which he would somehow manage to make all about himself.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 01, 2026
If you ignore what having a Secretary of Defense who decides punishment based on political favor does to discipline, my first question would be why anybody in the military gives a shit about what an greasy dipshit like Kid Rock thinks.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 01, 2026
The argument in favor of birthright citizenship:
1. Can you read simple English?
2. Have you read the 14th Amendment?
OK, we’re done here.
1. Can you read simple English?
2. Have you read the 14th Amendment?
OK, we’re done here.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 01, 2026
Boy, with decisions like the birthright citizenship case pending, I’m sure glad that anti-Constitutional right-wing nutjob Clarence Thomas was removed from the bench after he was caught accepting four million dollars in bribes.
Wait, what?
Wait, what?
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Apr 01, 2026
If Claude Code is like every other TypeScript programmer I’ve worked with, it will leave for a better job in two years and someone else will have to clean up its mess.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 31, 2026
The Donald J. Trump Presidential Library and Casino Resort in Miami is actually perfect. There could not be a better legacy.
https://www.npr.org/2026/03/31/nx-s1-5768094/trump-presidential-library-renderings-miami
https://www.npr.org/2026/03/31/nx-s1-5768094/trump-presidential-library-renderings-miami
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 31, 2026
💙⚾️
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 30, 2026
The first server I ever had root on was an RS/6000 running AIX, and I got the opportunity as a wildly-inexperienced 24-year-old because all the machines at work were named after colleges, and the regular administrator refused to touch a computer called “duke”.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 29, 2026
Our miraculous new software will do everything for you!
Here’s the 184 most popular hacks and tweaks to keep it from destroying your life. Be sure to check back daily for updates.
Here’s the 184 most popular hacks and tweaks to keep it from destroying your life. Be sure to check back daily for updates.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 28, 2026
If the day ends and Trump hasn’t posted something _at least_ as unhinged as dumping diarrhea on protesters from a fighter jet while wearing a crown, we’ll know that we’ve finally broken him.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 28, 2026
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 26, 2026
Decades ago, I’d read books like “Soul of a New Machine” and “Showstopper!” as romances, about late nights and impossible tasks and the ability to will something into existence using just brains and caffeine.
It took me far too long to recognize that they were actually warnings.
It took me far too long to recognize that they were actually warnings.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 25, 2026
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 24, 2026
Apparently, Apple isn’t going to patch iOS 18.6.2, meaning I either risk my information with DarkSword or my sanity with iOS 26.
Say what you want about Microsoft — please! use profanity! — but they wouldn’t let a zero-interaction, full-exfil bug go unfixed on a seven month old release.
Say what you want about Microsoft — please! use profanity! — but they wouldn’t let a zero-interaction, full-exfil bug go unfixed on a seven month old release.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 23, 2026
@drdrang Sizzler starts serving dinner at 4:30, man. A bounty awaits!
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 23, 2026
It is very funny that ICE didn’t change anything about their MO for the airport deployments.
The dude is wearing plate armor with a bunch of shit tactically stuck to it, to stand behind a Black woman sitting in a chair, doing the actual work, without getting paid.
The dude is wearing plate armor with a bunch of shit tactically stuck to it, to stand behind a Black woman sitting in a chair, doing the actual work, without getting paid.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 18, 2026
@drdrang I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m trying to delete it.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 18, 2026
@drdrang They should rename it the Betty Ford, so it can recover.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 18, 2026
It’s a little known rule, but if you rename a corporation after a technology and then abandon that technology within five years, you have to dissolve the entire company out of embarrassment.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 17, 2026
Fuck you, Google Photos. Fuck you.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 17, 2026
Just exploring my options here. Can anything other than beef be “corned”?
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 09, 2026
Juicy, deluxe, succulent, delectable… domesticated?
Man, fuck ICE.
Man, fuck ICE.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 03, 2026
An experiment.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Mar 02, 2026
“The most ethical AI company” is right up there with “the smartest member of the Trump administration” in the backhanded compliment hall of fame.
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Feb 28, 2026
How is Hegseth supposed to protect America’s interests if he can’t even bully a fuckin’ nerd?
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@gknauss@mastodon.social
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Feb 13, 2026
So, wait: Was I the only one who actually _liked_ to code?
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