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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
11h ago
Don't worry, Aldo. At least the government's fucking you.
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
20h ago
"I used this to pretend I'm Homelander!"
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
3d ago
We get very few originals like Don Martin anymore.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
3d ago
"And, for some reason, people are sitting nearby, masturbating!"
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
3d ago
Not as painful as picking one off a tree!
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
4d ago
Wait until you find out what they're doing to you through your toilet seat!
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
4d ago
But how many opportunities to quit do you get in life? Might as well go out with some style. Uh ... that *is* 3-ply, isn't it?
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
5d ago
Yet the FBI don't surveil Musk. I mean, even *before* Patel rendered it the Homer Simpson of alphabet agencies.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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in
asklemmy
·
5d ago
Uhh … that, uh … that thing I’m supposed to do. Um …
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
5d ago
Hope they like cats ...
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finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Apr 11, 2026
"Holding hands meant so much, baby".
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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in
lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 09, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Almost every part of the Winged Bean plant is edible. The pods, leaves, flowers, and even the tuberous roots can be consumed! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Apr 09, 2026
Put it out the front of your house with a sign saying 'Free mattress to fuck on, so long as I can film you doing it".
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 08, 2026
I’ve seen Wanda naked. Fact is, she already brought the roast beef.
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 08, 2026
Imagine being the trucker.
“I didn’t remortgage my house for the third time just to buy a truck that hauls dick!”
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 08, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The high fiber content in beans can help with weight management by promoting a feeling of fullness! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 07, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans were a staple in the diet of Roman soldiers, providing essential nutrients during long campaigns! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 06, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans help regulate blood sugar, making them a good choice for people with diabetes! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 05, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! A peanut is not a nut at all, but a bean! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 05, 2026
Bleached kidney stones on your ice cream?
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 02, 2026
Fly carefully! The nukes come from there! Seen it in movies! Farmer diligently bailing his hay and suddenly a nuke flies out of the ground behind him, the poor bastard!
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 01, 2026
Yes, but not everyone wants to wipe leaves on their anus in front of others.
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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in
lemmyshitpost
·
Apr 01, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans are tough! Scientists have successfully germinated a 10,000-year-old bean found in the Arctic! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 30, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You can freeze cooked beans for up to six months! Before reheating, thaw them in the refrigerator overnight! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 28, 2026
I like a bit of gorgonzola.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Mar 28, 2026
“Great Rao!”
- Pasta Sauce Afficionado, Superman
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 27, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans from thousands of years ago are genetically very close to the beans we eat today! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Mar 22, 2026
A blue what? Chevrolet?
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 21, 2026
Like … in a go-kart?
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 21, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Beans can be made into burgers, cakes, drinks, pies, fudge, muffins, jewelry, bean-bag chairs, toys, and musical instruments.! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 20, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The most baked beans eaten with chopsticks in one minute is 89, and was achieved by Annalia Henderson (USA) in Torrance, California, USA, on 1 December 2024! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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in
lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 19, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! The phrase “spill the beans” originated from an ancient Greek voting system, where beans were used to cast votes! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 18, 2026
Thank you for subscribing to Bean Facts! You will now receive fun daily facts about Beans! Lemmy Kilmister, the legendary frontman of Motörhead, was known for his unique diet, which included cold baked bean sandwiches! (To cancel Bean Facts, reply )
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 08, 2026
There’s nothing like a nice steaming pot of beans on a cold winter morning. Add some curry, they’ll be just as warm coming back out as they were going in.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 08, 2026
Perhaps not
It Depends
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 08, 2026
Fecal incontinence. Urinary incontinence. They do, indeed, describe different things, but can be placed under the incontinence umbrella.
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funny
·
Mar 07, 2026
Not anymore. Hospital successfully fished 'em out!
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
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·
Mar 07, 2026
The New York Pussy Department strikes again!
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finallymadeanaccount
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whitepeopletwitter
·
Mar 06, 2026
What if she was just an arsehole?
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finallymadeanaccount
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finallymadeanaccount
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whitepeopletwitter
·
Mar 06, 2026
Yeah, but that’s 3 months in dog years.
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finallymadeanaccount
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memes
·
Mar 05, 2026
MailSperm.com
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 02, 2026
There are US bases everywhere. Kinda like cockroaches, really.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 02, 2026
Slavery. Sex trafficking. Human rights abuses.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
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memes
·
Mar 01, 2026
You don’t always have to come back to the same general time.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
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memes
·
Mar 01, 2026
Nothing surprises me anymore.
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 01, 2026
Colonel looks a little tubby in the cheeks there. Has 2026 Colonel lost the weight, I wonder?
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lemmyshitpost
·
Mar 01, 2026
“Wise up, dickhead!”
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lemmyshitpost
·
Feb 22, 2026
Why aren’t those people pointing their phones at the Son of God and his enormous bird?
Why would Jesus care about Captain Kirk? Is He a Star Trek fan?
I doubt He’s furious at anyone. He’s too busy being a Whirling Dervish of Other Cheek-turning.
Why would I comment a made up word to pray for Jesus, or Captain Kirk, or the enormous bird, or the stoned photo-takers? Show me where ‘christfully’ (note they couldn’t even give the guy’s name a capital ‘C’) is in the Bible.
Also …
How dare this heretic presume to speak for The Lord!!!
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finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Feb 17, 2026
I ate a whole kilo of cheese once. Spent the next three days giving myself an umbilical hernia trying to get it out. Not even joking.
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lemmy.world
finallymadeanaccount
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lemmy.world
@finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
·
Feb 17, 2026
Not dick cheese, though. 🥲
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