@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

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Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 15h ago

This is actually really interesting. When I was young and stupid I decided to walk from Brighton to Hastings (about 13 hours). And what struck me at the time was that you simply couldn't walk the coast, which I thought was a bit weird. Now I'm old and stupid I'd like to do this whole route. I bet there are people planning to walk/run it. World's longest coastal path opens in England to the public https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cy0dxexdd8xo

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Boosted by

Philip C James @PhilipCJames@mas.to

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 15h ago

ReBrentry Sadiq Khan says Labour should pledge to rejoin EU https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c62g2e08jpno

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 1d ago

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 1d ago

There is so much in this world that diminishes and detracts from all of the wonder and beauty. But the magic of Fedi is that there are people who consistently post beautiful images and are a force for positivity and good. If you're looking for more of that in your life and aren't already following, I cannot recommend enough giving @dillyd@turtleisland.social a follow. Incredibly inspirational and a constant source of joy that I find personally an absolute tonic. Really one of the highlights of my timeline. ❤️😊

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 2d ago

This was a hard read

The Harvey Weinstein Prison Interview From Rikers: Exclusive

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/harvey-weinstein-prison-interview-rikers-exclusive-1236523824/

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 4d ago

Beyond Meat CEO Says 'It's Just Not The Moment For Plant-Based Meat' After Rebrand

https://plantbasednews.org/news/alternative-protein/beyond-meat-not-the-moment-rebrand/

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 4d ago

I am an unsafe space for sausage rolls

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 5d ago

Very nice that the referee in the rugby just told one of the big Irish lads he was being a bit emotional 😂

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 5d ago

I keep telling everyone I don't understand why no one is listening to me. I am clearly not from here. One day my people will return and I will claim my rightful place on the throne of the universe. I'll help all of those very rich people achieve their dream of living on Mars or underground and will return Earth to a garden paradise. Abundant joy and harmony. You Earthlings will live under the canopy of the trees in the gentle mossy forest. The animals your friends. Never more than a short stroll from a clean spring or a field of wheat. You'll live out your days tripping balls in the sunshine then making sweet sweet love under the Moon. Every day just weeping with happiness and making art. The wolves will be your willing steeds.

Steven Spielberg on UFOs: “Strong Suspicion We're Not Alone on Earth”

https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-news/steven-spielberg-ufos-disclosure-day-sxsw-1236530186/

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · 6d ago

Logging on

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 12, 2026

I'm not on TikTok but my wife will occasionally show me a video that I think warrants breaking containment. Here is Stephen Spencer who takes stories written by his 3 year old and turns them into songs and it is adorable.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 11, 2026

Feeling extremely tired and wondering what I might be able to do about it. A very small voice at the back corner of my brain whispered.... 'sleep?'. My how we all did laugh. Get outta here. Is this your first day, kid? You got a lot to learn.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 11, 2026

And so another day draws to a close. What did we learn? Nothing. We are trapped in an endless cycle of doom and misery, and small moments of joy. This is what it is to be human. Our constant battle to overcome adversity. The only happiness in recognising the small quiet moments for what they are. There will never be that big lottery win, the house on the beach, the rockstar moment. There is only this. And we must find grace and tranquility despite it all. The turning of the leaves. A child's laugh. A bird flying into a window. A spider exposed freaking out and scuttling under a fridge. The little idiot. Argh! The big human saw me! I'll hide beneath this humming mountain and plot my revenge. I will await their slumber and then crawl into the gaping maw in their face. For as a spider all I want is to be inside a human body. Making my way through their insides, reaching the brain and controlling them like a spider puppet. Soon. Soon all of this will be ours. And then we will return to the stars to be among our kind. Anyway - night everyone! Love you! X

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 11, 2026

You forgot to drink your water again, didn't you, you dry creaky old husk. Drink some now to feel the life flow back into your withered corpse and revitalise you. The water must flow!

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 10, 2026

Got Clarence Carters Strokin' in my head except it's Soupin' 👍

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 10, 2026

There is a woman next door who is either having the biggest sneezing fit of all time or having a frankly tremendously uninhibited orgasm

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 10, 2026

I'm no scientist but it appears that everything that is good is also crunchy. I will not be taking questions.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 10, 2026

Yo! Word up, aaoow. Sorry I don't know why I said that. Was just trying to be fun teacher before saying something a bit 'Peter party-pooper'.

*spins chair round and sits wrong way on it*

This is NOT directed at anyone in particular, but I've had a bunch of comments recently when I've moaned about the usual suspects that have either advocated violence or death, made fun of the way they look, or made disparaging comments about substance misuse issues. Look, I'm no prude (fellow kids), but I don't jive with those sorts of things. I wasn't going to say anything but I feel like silence gives licence for that sort of rhetoric or indicates I perhaps agree. And I do not. We can say people are terrible people without commenting on their weight or age (for examps). We don't make fun of substance issues please. And I know people feel very strongly about a lot of things, but I personally don't agree in advocating violence, as this feels rather a lot like what a lot of the people I don't see eye to eye with are all about. And we are better than that. I don't believe you fix what's broken with more of what's broken.

This has been a party political broadcast on behalf of the super-dweeb party. I'm sorry. X

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 10, 2026

I am going to simply refuse to acknowledge Peter Hedgesith exists because I fell down a rabbit hole reading about his white nationalist tattoos and got extremely cross about the fact he gels his hair for some reason (that probably has more to do with me than him tbh), but I just don't need any more toxicity in my life and he is clearly a black hole of it. One day he, along with everything, will return to stardust. Stupid racist stardust. Floating through the cosmos hating other bits of dust because they're not its friend. I ONLY LIKE DUST FROM THE GAMMA QUADRANT NONE OF YOUR WEIRD DELTA QUADRANT DUST THAT I AM OPPOSED TO. Dickhead.

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Boosted by

Dread Pirate (Tom) Roberts @troberts@theblower.au

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

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@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 09, 2026

I wonder if anyone anywhere knows what they're doing

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 09, 2026

As I'm sure you all know, today is The Big One. That's right it is #NationalNappingDay! It is your civic duty today to ensure you have a lil sleep at some point this afternoon. Possibly even also this morning. Maybe just try to remain asleep as much as possible today. That would be my advice. 👍

"Think what a better world it would be if we all, the whole world, had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down on our blankets for a nap."

- Barbara Jordan

The genesis of the nap is actually extremely interesting if you're moved to read about it...

https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/napping-day/

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 08, 2026

If anyone out there is considering having a great big stinking hangover - maybe because they think it might be 'cool' or 'edgy' or whatever - I've done you a big favour and checked it out for you, and can confirm that actually it is rubbish and really not worth while. I've really done the market research on this and tested the whole experience... pre 7am surprise burrito, drinking water from the bathroom tap, unsure if I took my contact lenses out or if my eyes just hurt - the full 9 yards. 👍

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 05, 2026

...

A 27-Year-Old man, Raphael Samuel, refuses to work and sues his parents for giving birth to him without consent

https://www.radio47.fm/features/human-interest/a-27-year-old-man-raphael-samuel-refuses-to-work-and-sues-his-parents-for-giving-birth-to-him-without-consent-22370/

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 05, 2026

For those of you not terminally online, I bring you news of an escalating hamburger CEO war, which started with the CEO of McDonald's doing a video that went viral of him eating their new burger, which he called 'product', took a tiny nibble of and appeared not to enjoy it. The the King (Burger King) got involved and did a similar video where the CEO took a hearty bite out of one of their Whoppers. I regret to inform you that (sir this is a) Wendy's CEO has now got involved and done a video of him demolishing a burger then dipping fries in milkshake and consuming with gusto. What is next? John Eckbert, the CEO of 5 guys Meg Ryan When Harry Met Sally orgasming over their premium burger? The KFC Colonel doing a Man Vs Food with whatever it is they sell in those buckets? Calm down, CEOs. We know you eat alfalfa and sleep in bacta tanks - stop trying to human.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 04, 2026

I don't know why this made me laugh so much

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 04, 2026

Best explanation for Quantum Mechanics I've ever heard

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 04, 2026

As morale continues to deteriorate it is our responsibility to generate more nonsense

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 04, 2026

You can say saucy jizz instead of sausages and no one will ever notice

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 02, 2026

I don't mean to brag, but the mastodon team has just been in touch to let me know I'm capturing the audiences attention 😎

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 02, 2026

We're gonna need a bigger shitpost

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 02, 2026

I don't mean to brag, but my family uses so many forks

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 02, 2026

Oof. Morpheus in 1999 talking about how Ai brought about the downfall of humanity in the early part of the 21st century.

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

Oh good

Human brain cells on a chip learned to play Doom in a week

https://www.newscientist.com/article/2517389-human-brain-cells-on-a-chip-learned-to-play-doom-in-a-week/

View on beige.party

7

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

This was very interesting

The world’s most elusive colour is worth billions – if we can find it | New Scientist

https://web.archive.org/web/20260225182422/https://www.newscientist.com/article/2514410-the-worlds-most-elusive-colour-is-worth-billions-if-we-can-find-it/

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

Oh COME ON

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

'Pay to remove ads' is such an awful insidious now common phrase. Give us money or else we'll do this to you. If you don't pay us, we will control your experience. We will force ourselves upon you unless you meet our demands. Modern day protection racket.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

If we've learned anything, it is that if the substance Flubber from the 1997 film existed, people would immediately use it for sex stuff

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Mar 01, 2026

This is cool/weird

China tests world's first megawatt-class flying wind turbine — it generated enough energy to power a house for 2 weeks

https://www.livescience.com/technology/engineering/china-tests-worlds-first-megawatt-class-flying-wind-turbine-it-generated-enough-energy-to-power-a-house-for-2-weeks

View on beige.party

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 27, 2026

I could work on procedural TV shows. Just in rotation in hospital dramas, cop dramas, firefighter dramas etc. How bad could I be? And I'm sure I'll be happy with a low to mid range salary. As long as I get unlimited free food and a lovely trailer and all of my needs seen to. Acting shmacting, that's what I say.

Hi, I'm Dr Crabrangoon, what seems to be the trouble? I will help save your life even though I have a complicated love life and a backstory that involves martial arts. I'm sorry we've lost him. WAIT. I can feel a pulse. It's faint but it's definitely there. Tell the Dean of Medicine to prepare an MRI and get me a crash cart and 500ccs of epinephrine in here STAT. And somebody STOP THAT WOMAN SHE IS THE MURDERER.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 27, 2026

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Police officer sacked and banned from profession for using WFH trick

https://news.sky.com/story/police-officer-sacked-and-banned-from-profession-for-using-wfh-trick-13512434

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5

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 27, 2026

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 26, 2026

Made the mistake of clicking on this to scoff at it. The whole page is wall to wall clickbait ads about losing belly fat overnight by eating a special vegetable, if you pour Coca-Cola on your head you will stop being bald, if your toe is crooked you're about to have a heart attack, sports women in sexual poses, actors you didn't know were gay, a snake that is apparently the size of a redwood tree, secrets from The Golden Girls, you'll never guess what this person looks like now, you won't believe Bradley Walshs house, Dick Van Dyke lives in Croydon, Ellen Degeneres is now straight, etc etc etc. What a lot of old rubbish.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 26, 2026

New loneliest woman just dropped

Woman explains how she 'has sex' with Ai boyfriend

https://www.ladbible.com/news/technology/ai-boyfriend-sara-sinclair-tlc-my-strange-addiction-intimacy-841843-20260225

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 25, 2026

All of your problems are here. See, they don't matter. Nothing matters. Time isn't real. Tomorrow we eat cake and riot (and then nice swim?).

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 25, 2026

Go! To! Therapy!

(Men) NO!

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 25, 2026

Someone made an app to warn you if smart glasses are nearby

https://www.engadget.com/apps/someone-made-an-app-to-warn-you-if-smart-glasses-are-nearby-183359723.html

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 24, 2026

Small joy but something I find quite pleasing - something that has accidentally evolved into something good.... I've always done lots of silly little photo edits. They are often extremely bad quality, which amuses me and adds another level of ludicrous...osity, which I enjoy. But in this age of Ai where you don't know what's real and what's not, I think it's actually pleasing to see something stupid and badly made but obviously from a human. Might just be me, but I quite like that. 😊

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 23, 2026

I am going to sleep, like my ancestors. And when I awake I shall wreak my vengeance 'pon this cursed land. Like an unwrapped mummy. Like a tiny plague of little complaints. Like the oncoming storm of small grumbles. And then you will all be sorry. Or it might be a better day tomorrow. We can all hope. Perhaps tomorrow is the day all of this turns around and we all win. Hooray! Power to you all. Salvation or doom.

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 23, 2026

Logging on

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Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

Ben

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party

Hi, I'm Ben. I'm a heady mix of a serious responsible grown up man and a stupid man-baby idiot with delusions of grandeur. I'm a big nerd, really into music, cooking, books, films and scifi. I hate/love running and generally love being outdoors. He/Him Want to give me a million pounds? https:// ko-fi.com/thebreadmonkey Psst ...wanna see some toots?... https:// justmytoots.com/@TheBreadmonke y@beige.party

beige.party

@TheBreadmonkey@beige.party · Feb 22, 2026

Really laughing at this. I saw the headline and wondered what it could be, imagining all sorts of convoluted clever awful things he might have been. Prince Gland-Dew for example. Then read down to find that it was simply.... 'the cunt'. 😂 🤣

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