Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer.
Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
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Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
I say we but it’s they, obviously. I knew her for fourteen years and loved her, but she wasn’t my mother, or wife of sixty years. The anniversary would’ve been this autumn. Seeing him with her in that last week was heartbreaking. I don’t know how things are going to be when it starts to hit them.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
So of course having said I’ll be blathering on here I immediately disappear for a couple of days. Consistency is for wusses.
I got home last night after nearly a fortnight at my beloved’s, and will be back and forth over the weekend because while I want to be there for her, the world has annoyingly failed to stop entirely and I have to sort this place out a bit because work is being done starting Tuesday and apparently things like accessing the bits they’re working on are important. Rude. And of course great timing on the part of my landlords, but they do these things in bulk and apparently it can’t be put off.
As I say, annoyingly the world doesn’t stop, or even pause, and though most people are understanding up to a point some things just can’t be moved and have to keep grinding on.
We’re in the aftershock now, that period after a horrible thing where you know intellectually that it’s happened but it doesn’t feel fully real yet. There are momentary wobbles, but mostly you’re functional if a little numb and plod along doing things that need doing, or just to distract yourself, and wonder when it’s going to really hit you; when you’re going to completely fall apart.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.
Nonbinary person. Mad (had various diagnoses since my mid-to-late teens, now late forties). On the long waiting list for a formal ASD assessment, but sure enough to be prepared to wait for a definitive answer. Extremely awkward and bad at interacting, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Went full hermit several years ago, and now trying to work out how to undo that without breaking my brain any further.