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• The joke was, this was about Adam and Eve at the same time

  I went to a Mormon church today. Religious cultural building. Very warm, successful people, by the state of their building and clothing. But y’know, the Knowledge of good and evil is that there are superpositions one must understand to begin understanding God’s Kingdom and beyond. I had a wonderful set of experiences there in the presence of the Lord. Likewise, I had a very bad experience, being the broken soul I am. I shall explain the best I can. There is the set of books, The Hitchhiker’s G...

• But honestly, I am grateful. I just wish I didn't have to be chosen to be hurt so I have a reason to be grateful.

  Sweet Jesus. I needed that drink. I had to spend the afternoon with my mother-in-law. I had to. I couldn’t say no. I would be a complete asshole if I forbid her from barging into my house when she said she was going to, to then clean my apartment in a way that is going to cause her son to have fits because he is as damaged by her as I am by my father. Narcissists, amirite? Well y’know, it’s a generational curse and we tend to attract each other. But y’know, I had several ways I would prefer to d...

• I'm totally NOT a fed, guys

  God says…God’s always saying shit, and so am I. Well, perhaps not “saying” them, but my thumb moves as it does. I get the impression that I am going to be interviewed at some point, but God has used this placeholder before. I don’t even know how to be a normal human anymore. That helps with the dazzle camouflage. Back in WWI, the British Navy painted their ships all sorts of angled n abstract, black n white patterns which made the ships easier to spot but made it harder for the enemy to determ...

• I'd kerfundridge my own ass if I could

  Did I do a smart or a stupid? God has been telling me to drink, but at the same time threatening me with jail time or time in a hell realm, which caused me to kerfundridge God. What this means is, I’m schizoaffective and process reality differently. I don’t hear hallucinations (though I do have Rusterd), but rather my ability to freely associate meaning from random stimuli allows me to divine guidance from my own interpretation of the world around me. Y’know, when you draw a tarot card, that’s...

• Everybody thinks Bugs Bunny is cool, but then they meet a real Bugs and crap on how weird they are

  My life partner is in the hospital; psyche ward. He has previously forced me to accept that he would falsely accuse me. Has he done that? Is this part of his/the CIA’s plan? I’m replaying what he said on the phone. Couldn’t even say “I love you back.” That’s Karma for not hugging him last time. If you’re anxious all of the time, you’re really anxious none of the time, which is why They make me feel like I’m a cop, and thus I think it, too. Cue five thousand comments telling me to take my meds,...

• Post #2502079

  Or I’m a skilled righter a cop, I mean performance (f)artist with no connection to the United States government OR military. I might be attracting attention to myself to specific demographics, but you’re prejudiced, so you’re obviously either young and think you’re helping someone you think is suffering by reinforcing the status quo of normative behavior…so you actively harm people who are genuinely different as they hear that ish ten times a day just being themselves, or you’re evil. So maybe I...

• Master makes me keep it on they're watching

  Story: I was on LSD. With then gf. She says we’re being watched. Of course! Of course me, who looked too much in the direction of kids and told ROTC cadre that my nonexistent sister got me pregnant. Of course! Type message into URL bar. Hit enter. Strange pop-up. Goes to clearly coded blog post. Red/blue pill choice at bottom. Realize serpent tempting Eve. Call out. Blog disappears. Gf confused. Try to explain. Can’t. Suddenly telepathy. Strange af. Lasts five to ten minutes. Fades. Nothing re...

• A theism? No I don't believe, I Know things

  A professor of philosophy finishes a trick four piece puzzle from the character’s childhood Professor Agneto: Ah well that was easy! Twas a trick, putting the fourth piece in, as if you put the first three pieces together, the fourth won’t fit because of the topological constraints put on the system by the the initial axioms. Smart man: Prove it! Professor Agneto: I’m sorry? Smart man: I outright reject your claim on the basis that if you said something you must prove it and I will not l...

• Schizophrenia and Synchronicity

  cross-posted from: lemmy.world/post/46260505 Schizophrenia is like a big box where a lotta different things people experience that we don’t fully understand are put, and also some types of liars. I’m diagnosed schizoaffective, and it is disorienting, the schizo aspects of that, which are only further enhanced by the bipolar aspects I experience; emotional dysregulation + psychosis = nightmare patient to doctors. And I was! But then I did a bunch of spiritual work thanks to psychedelics (to c...

• Angela speak to me

  cross-posted from: lemmy.world/post/46223619 So, people ask: if Adam n Eve had Cain n Abel, how did we get from there to here? And the easy, funny answer is incest. The easy, serious answer is that the Bible is not a literal recount of what happened, and these are stories meant to preserve information across time through oral tradition, thus Adam and Eve represents the fall of man in the agricultural revolution and Cain and Abel encapsulate something in regards to war and nation-states in hu...

• Financially abused masochist

  Y’know what I love? Being financially abused. We just walked to go fetch his bike that I had to take more loans from his father to pay for, but I had $150 of unexpected charges from what I must assume from his completely broken, in no way usable, ESPECIALLY for Amazon laptop that I see Amazon open all the time. I genuinely don’t know what legal shit is coming. In tandem with starting my medication at full doses was a number of seemingly coordinated events that resulted in me confessing and bei...

• Touched by an asshole

  cross-posted from: lemmy.world/post/46172117 The majority of the time, I start writing and I don’t know where it’s going. A specific type of typo which I call a kumquat and the way my phone’s keyboard’s predictive text suggested a statistically aberrant word (a raspberry) planted a message about writing propaganda to prevent unsocialized young men from touching women when they start drinking, which happens to a percentage of the population! I grabbed a woman’s ass once on Halloween. I don’t...

• I'll let you juggle my balls for a dollar

  I juggled today, by the freeway. Made eight bucks. That’s not important. I thought it was an important metric in which to judge my capabilities as a performance artist, but no. How well you can field a question/interaction you do not expect is at the top of that list. You will never know everything that another person will think of, nor can you plan past the second question in a lotta cases even if you could. I did this shit in my hometown of Syracuse. The joke is I went around asking random s...

• Uniquely a dingledoo

  Ugh…made a mistake this morning. Waking up? No, actually, I just made a favorable joke about Epstein in light of my Knowledge garnered from having ALSO been a cop. I think? Well, I wrote about that a bit on the conspiracy sub…er, community. Whatever tf it is here. That’s kinda part of my anathema in life, becoming a pariah. My true anathema, the curse that has most ailed and haunted me, is offbrand Walmart Benadryl, and I thank Christ my dick still works, because science says it shouldn’t. But...

• What Would Epstein Do?

  Trying to think of a post that don’t stink while my brain be lame and to blame is my medicine. Started back on Deprakote with a larger dose of my Risperidone. Knocked me the fudge out halfway through yesterday. I’m normally in the hospital when I get started on this daily regiment, and I tend to pace ten or so miles a day. The last time I was in, my feet grew really sore. It felt good to rest, though. That’s the wisdom of “blessed are the meek, for they will be satisfied.” Y’know, if you’re ou...

• Do you think Tarzan was a virgin when he met Jane, or was he clappin' gorilla cheeks?

  I got a poop in my butt. A goopy one. It’s all good. It will come out eventually, unlike that porcelain elephant I lost up there some years back. Don’t know what happened to that, just like I don’t know if I poisoned myself with the nicotine gum. Felt like gagging all night. Maybe instead of chewing five at a time, I should boof them… Kumquat tells me book, which seems like the logical autocorrect in that case, although with these kids being as they are, and statistical trends being what they...

• I was in a cult, I think

  Woke up this morning to check Reddit, despite Lemmy World being where the action is, and that turned out to be the right choice as I got a chance to create a burner account and give some advice, which led me to realize that’s something I’m really good at. With what has happened, narrative being evolved within me as it has, seemingly in tandem with taking my medication at the doses I need to, my mind was on finding a job. So I do a bit of searching, little depressing how little self-help is for m...

• Homeless wisdom

  Gotta write God says. Pandora closes as I start typing. Children in the background. I live right by a school. It’s nice, y’know, being able to just go from homelessness to living in one of the first apartments my life partner sent me to get into. No hassle, outside of accidentally impersonating a veteran, I mean. My life could be way different is this were a godless universe. The rollercoaster of my life could have ended disastrously the way I had to go to fix myself; make myself more attuned...

• Skeeter me this

  So, along with my ban from X, which pushed me here as my life partner found after his Reddit ban, I now have to go on Blue Sky and pretend to be retarded, because aliens. Sigh. Well, y’know, X was garbage; I could definitely see why I could be useful there, edumacating n all. And the thing, y’know, if I was forced to pick if I were on the left or the right (I choose up AND down), I would pick the left ideological, kinda, but fully uncensored, I definitely fit better in the alt right. Superposit...

• The Story of How Learning to Juggle Changed My Life

  cross-posted from: lemmy.world/post/46026494 I want to tell you a story. This is the story of how I overcame my crippling social anxiety and started rising into what I am today. Obviously, as anyone paying attention to me for half a second can attest, you should know that I’m diagnosed as schizoaffective n autistic with a buttload of trauma. God dealt me a helluva tough hand to play, but I’ve learned to play it well. I was always the weird kid, and when I went off to college on my own, I h...

• Take risks, don't gamble

  Today’s word is gamble. The Army taught me to take risks, not gamble, which is why I am simultaneously calm and on edge about this whole getting arrested thing, which I now again believe will happen when we are traveling to a monastary in another state on our bikes and drugs will magick themselves in our possession thanks to Joe Arpagio’s fine, uniformed criminals. This mixed feeling is a product of knowing the United States military industrial complex does not throw all these resources over t...

• I will teach you dingleburgers if it's the last thing I do

  God told me you dingleburgers come across a word like dingleburgers and your brain turns off. This is something I think is important to understand: defining a word is a fundamentally different skill than understanding the function of a word and using it correctly. If you were to ask me about this word I invented entirely on my own (as opposed to some words God had me nonce to invent), phenomequalitesselation, this is the definition I am going to emgineer right now. Phenomequalitesselation (n)...

• Zephyr of God

  I hear what are God’s whispers I steer ship with these zephyrs Carrying me when there is non Lifting me with abundance ton Faith to be free following word Don’t need much haven’t hoard Of material goods- Karma pay Sorcerer masochists doth flay Their selves with + entangling Oh no, that’s not what I meant Teaching God be I sole intent Funny joke to that feeb fucks Who thinks internet is a truck And thus must read each line Loners learning of the divine Joke, of cours...