Post #4280530

Day 2 of the new drug. I read up on it yesterday. I like gathering information, but now I'm really discouraged! I read so many articles about how this delivery method was untested, and why it wasn't going to work (mostly having to do with peptide size, absorption issues, and saliva and stomach degradation of the drug), and how it wasn't metabolized well at all this way and all this stupid shit that made me really depressed that I can't do the injectable (which is 95% more effective, apparently) bc fuck needles. Still, I'm sticking to my guns with this route for now, administering it precisely as it should be administered, following all the rules, and crossing my fingers that it will do me some kind of good. Eventually I may try needle desensitization training, but later. Later!!! I can't think about it now. Too stressful. Or, maybe, I can figure out a way to increase my income so I could afford injection pens? Not there yet! Had minor stomach upset starting around 4:30 PM yesterday I attributed to swallowing the first dose, and that didn't go away until after I was asleep overnight. I'm used to stomach upset on a pretty regular basis for whatever reason, but it was pretty annoying. Expected, but annoying. Understanding that once saliva has started to mix with the drug there's no point in swallowing it, also because the stomach and liver will completely inactivate it, I spit most of it out after keeping it under my tongue for about 10 minutes today. Two minutes is the supposed effective time, but I was able to keep it in longer by not opening my mouth and not talking to my dogs. Also, even though the pharmacy said it doesn't need to be refrigerated, I know now that peptides can degrade under variable temperature and light conditions (e.g. the bathroom), so I stuck the bottle in the fridge. I'm trying everything I can to make this work! The thing about stomach upset is, your guts are sending constant crisis signals to your brain so it puts you into a mild fight-or-flight state which increases cortisol, etc. So getting into that state is not good AT ALL for me, considering my stress and inflammation markers were already incredibly high when they were measured in May and my HCP insists that I need to "reduce my stress" this summer. I've also learned a lot more recently about neurodivergent brains and how that's basically impossible for a lot of of us. There are switches/filters in our brains that just don't work properly. It's possible if I went back on a really strict keto diet, which is difficult when you don't eat red meat, that I could influence that a little bit. I don't know. So, I resorted to diet 7-Up and Tums. Not things I usually eat or drink, but calming the stomach down in order to calm my nervous system down is essential. I remain optimistic and hopeful that I will see some benefit from this drug administered this way. I didn't realize I was on the cutting edge of science doing this! That just means that nobody's studied this particular way of doing it, even though it is allowed by the FDA through some kind of compounding pharmacy loophole. I trust my local compounding pharmacy. They're not quacks. They may be onto something here. I doubt they're going to make up a drug formulation that doesn't work. Only time will tell, though. One plodding foot in front of the other. It's the best I can do. My birthday is in a week. I'm not excited. I won't be able to have a cake or ice cream or a meal out or drink more than one glass of wine, so I think I'm just gonna hide. Food is no longer fun. My family will try to force me to celebrate, but hopefully my work schedule will prevent that. Hah! I know. Curmudgeon. I'm annoying my own self at this point. *stomps off in old*