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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io
Post #2061585
2025-04-21 21:09 UTC
The year is 2033. I press my fingerprint to the scanner to verify that I am a human; it pricks the finger, scans the blood, then chirps happily: "human detected".
Relieved, I tell the AI "okay, generate the resume and submit it for me please".
InterviewGPT works for a moment.
"Done" it purrs
I sigh and wonder why did it come to this. I went to a good University, I got a degree. I even verified my LinkedIn and Website with HumanID fingerprints. None of my applications get looked at; I've sent hundreds of hand crafted ones.
They get rejected instantly, seconds after I send them.
It's the same every time: Two paragraphs of bla bla bla, and then oh by the way, they think I'm an AI. Whatever
So I caved. I got the premium subscription to InterviewGPT. "Guaranteed interviews" or your money back
Well, we go on food stamps next week, so fuck it; dignity is for the employed.
The premium subscription is pretty slick. It finds the jobs for you, creates the resume, a profile picture, and even changes your name and gender. Algorithmically detecting who the company is most likely to hire
This company wants a "Fred McCane" who knows C# and GitOps, apparently.
Whatever
"Guess that subscription is worth the ridiculous fee," I mumble, reading the hrGPT acceptance letter. It invites me to take a code exam. Proctored by KnowledgeAI.
Do I consent to the interview?
"Fuck you, of course not" I say to myself.
I hit "yes", and prick my finger.
Curious, I look up who owns KnowledgeAI. After some digging, I find it's owned by the same firm that does InterviewGPT
I'm not sure why I bothered looking that up
Oh, it's because the premium tier of InterviewGPT has advanced detection avoidance *and* signal obfuscation. That seemed odd
heh
I remember an adage: "The only winners of war are mercenaries because they get to play both sides"
I prick my finger. The test starts.
I don't even bother looking into the sensors. They're overridden by InterviewGPT anyway. If a human reviews this (they won't), I'm the perfect Fred
Whatever
1/2
Replies (6)
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"Remember when we wanted to change the world?" I say to a photograph on the wall.
It's a picture of me and my friends from college. We started the Women who Build club on campus. None of them work in tech anymore.
I don't blame them. Mostly, I just envy them. We're all on food-stamps, anyways
"Is this fucked up?" I think to myself. InterviewGPT announced a new feature: it helps you with your foodstamp and unemployment paperwork.
Regardless, it's helpful. I might keep the subscription just for that. "I bet that's what a lot of people are thinking right now" I muse, morbidly.
I check my inbox, and a new email floats in. I catch my breath; the title contains the magic word I've desperately needed: "offer"
They don't negotiate. The hours are horrific. And after fees and InterviewGPT costs, the pay is minimum wage. Do I accept?
"Whatever," I mumble. I prick my finger.
Open ##2867861
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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io well done, I hate it
Open ##2867874
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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io have you ever read doctorow's Party Discipline?
Open ##2867875
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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io
Like a YouTube comment I saw earlier today, I don't like this story because it's 100% true.
Open ##2867879
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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io The narritive reminds me of the Vonnegut, Jr. book Player Piano
Open ##2867882
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@hazelweakly@hachyderm.io hopefully the software isn’t manipulated.
Open ##2867883