Elektrine lite

← Feed

@QueerMatters@mstdn.social

Post #1783101

2026-04-23 03:02 UTC

RE: https://mstdn.social/@QueerMatters/116451560460465027 I just realised something: A lot of us fall down the self improvement rabbit hole to help with this. _BUT_, I think this focus on this can be a trap. We retreat into ourselves, "improve" parts of ourselves, overcome things internally etc... This is what we're used to: other people are dangerous, right? I needed to learn to be vulnerable with people, to practice rupture and repair. This has been a missing piece for me. I'm still learning to building safety with others. #ActuallyAutistic

Replies (3)

  • @QueerMatters@mstdn.social 2026-04-23 03:04

    Learning to build a village around yourself, learning to let people in... Learning to _be_ consoled! Its so hard. Especially in a society thats taught us all to be so individualised. Even worse if you grew up traumatised.

    Open ##2137345

  • @shijikori@tech.lgbt 2026-04-23 04:52

    @QueerMatters I skimmed through your posts on the topic. I've honestly been dealing with that... a lot. I'm currently scared to go back to employment as I've often struggled to integrate in workplaces. My last job was particularly traumatic, I've not been this scared since the first job I've ever had. I also struggle forming lasting friendships as I've had a variety of issues with those relationships... A lot of times, my attachment to friendships was more intense than my friends, eventually breaking down into a lot of friction and difficult feelings for me. A lot of times, I felt excluded or feared that my inability to understand some social contexts and subtext would also be used for laughs against me. If there's one thing that has worked out for me, so far, it's more committed relationships. I am not comfortable with romantic feelings (I don't quite understand them) but I really love being intimate, close and caring with others. I currently feel relationship anarchy suits me best.

    Open ##2137346

  • @onemoreday@critter.cafe 2026-04-23 18:01

    @QueerMatters learning to be vulnerable with people has been a lifelong challenge for me ... i am completely accepting and open to others opening up to me and being "a hot mess" but I have trouble embodying that for myself and letting others in all the while knowing that in "turtle mode", other people are missing out on my inner life

    Open ##2137347