And so you should! If I knew someone would want to be known as a “man” or “woman”, then I would use those terms. However, responding appropriately to that wish might not mean that I’d be blind to the fact the subject is a trans wo/man. There’s simply unlikely to be any reason to point that out. Similarly, I’m happy with being a “man”. I don’t really care if others regard me as a “cis man”, but I might ask that term is dropped if it’s used directly about or to me. I don’t and never will recognise the term. I’ll happily use the appropriate pronouns, etc, but as mentioned before, I cannot regard trans women as belonging to the same category as what I am calling here “biological women” because they haven’t grown up and lived as women. I mentioned before about female reproduction and reproductive health. It cannot be understated how huge this can be for many women. Periods, period products, period pains, impacts on histamine sensitivies, getting pregnant, ecotopic prenancies, miscarriages, endometriosis, an “incompetant” cervix, still birth, premature birth, full term birth, breast feeding… The list goes on. For sure, these things don’t wholly define what it is to be a woman, but it sure as hell helps shape the bodies and minds of the only group of people who make all of us. To forget or ignore that is disrespectful to women, in my opinion. It doesn’t matter how much a trans woman claims to want to be a part of this group, or how upset she gets at the likes of me for saying otherwise, but she will never be a part of that group. I would never say that the particular journey or struggles of a trans woman are less significant, but they are fundamentally different and for that reason it puts them in a similar, but different group.