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• Post #4470445

  This weird attempt to try and smear Banksy only highlights that the MoJ spent an absolute fortune washing a bit of paint off a wall from an artist much loved by most people. I'm sure the same cannot be said for the MoJ. Bristol artist Banksy's works cost taxpayers nearly £150k https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx2vnny7j5zo

• Post #4470058

  We interrupt your scheduled broadcast to bring you an important message

• Post #4464636

  Have you ever wondered what Monty Python and the Holy Grail would look like sped up and with every spoken word in the film placed in alphabetical order? Wonder no more, friends. And Grail Holy Monty Python https://vimeo.com/1215576459

• Post #4463317

  Good morning you bloody lovelies. I hath awakened hungover to the max and it appears I tried to contact a bunch of online friends irl last night. Lol. I am shy af and have long resisted the leap from broadcasting my thoughts to actual real life communication, but it turns out there is a golden ratio of gin and pizza after being in a field for a week that moves me to want to drunkenly chat down the phone. However nobody answered, which feeds into my solipsistic belief that none of you are real an...

• Post #4431947

  Off to see some nunz 😎

• Post #4326346

  People are basically just skellingtons with skin on. And what we perceive as beauty (ie models) are basically those who are most closely just bones with some skin stretched over. So our ideals as humans must be a skull face. Underneath it all we're just bones who want to get it on with other bones. But we're all going around, pretending, with our skin and whatnot. Like a fancy hat or a shawl. Welcome to my Sunday morning thoughts. :trans_undertale:

• Post #4308623

  There's a lot to be said about the fires happening all over the place due to climate catastrophe. Mine is a small voice, but this week sees the first paid holiday I've been able to take in 25 years.... and unfortunately the place we're due to travel to tomorrow with a couple of other families.... just burnt down. The initial reaction was of course to try and pivot to rescue our family holiday, with all of the admin involved. However this morning was the first time I got an opportunit...

• Post #4308164

  I don't mean to be the best person in the entire universe but I'm afraid I can't help it and Trish and I did a 10k run at 6.30 this morning. I think that means I get a special ring or don't have to pay anymore taxes or something.

• Post #4307976

  This is incredible. All! Literally everything in creation! Crisps, the FIFA Presidency, garibaldi biscuits, trams, Graham Souness, every piece of gravel, the Padel tournament, the entire back catalogue of the Beastie Boys, every kind of watermelon, pubic lice, my bedsheets, the power of the sun, 700 trillion cubic meters of sand, every dog cat and mouse and also komodo dragon, the concept of peace, every nuclear weapon, the Taj Mahal, all of the moons, the Iberian Peninsula, you, me, every crab,...

• Post #4297449

  Her name was Lola, she was a shōgun

• Post #4296814

  1.43am. A time to venture forth into the downstairs gloom and create culinary abominations. As I eat pesto korma sandwiches I imagine outside the windows in the inky blackness waiting to suddenly emerge, dances a monstrous grinning evil imp, who will one day slowly but suddenly appear from the murk like a shark. And I shall be suspended there in the ocean of my imagination, helpless. Unable to escape, but forced to watch as it advances upon me cackling and dancing its wild dance.

• Post #4288776

  Through a sequence of events I do not care to explain, I hath conjured forth curry for 14 people. It's..... a lotta curry.

• Post #4283641

  Do you think anyone has gone actually mad from hold music? Total psychotic break. One moment just sat there listening to some awful jaunty two-tone piece of shit music and the next..... frothing at the mouth rabid.

• Post #4269879

  I know technology is the new devil but if I could I would totally Lawnmower Man myself and live inside the Fediverse

• Post #4268433

  Today is a new day (and not a 'bra day' as my predictive text seems so eager to say). Hope anew (War Stars). All of your transgressions have been EXPUNGED. Got all dem punges right outta you. No more punge! Today is the day the new you begins. The you you want you to be. The Real You™. Have a great day, everybody, and misfortune to your enemies! X

• Post #4230666

  I often marvel that there must be vast universes within others as there are within me. Infinite planets marching through their orbits into entropy. Endless swirling clusters of nebulae. A trillion trillion stars exploding into life and slowly fading again, consuming themselves with unimaginable power. Incomprehensible. Inconceivable. And then sometimes I look at a person and think..... yeah that's not all going on inside. Am I alone? Am I the only person? Maybe I was born different. Maybe I&...

• Post #4229628

  It occurs to me this morning that I have been unquestioningly taking all of the vitamins my wife has told me to take, and that this would be an excellent way to kill me off. The perfect crime. Poisoned to death over nearly 3 decades. The cops will never suspect a thing.

• Post #4188458

  Someone posted this but with no alttext. I couldn't find anyone else who's already posted it to boost, so am re-posting it. From the far right march in London yesterday. From, of course, Led By Donkeys. Edit - Tricia also posted it yesterday! https://mastodon.scot/@TriciaB/116586009943155391

• Post #4175047

  Goodnight you bloody gorgeouses. You warriors of light and hope and truth. May all the good things come to you in small but meaningful ways. Little things that lift you up away from all the big nasties that dominate our world in such oppressive and toxic ways. We cannot change the tectonic plates always in motion, but we can smile at a stranger, say thank you unexpectedly (like a kindness ninja). We can choose community and support, where it's so sorely lacking. It's so easy to recognise...

• Post #4173545

  Well. 10k woodland run in 28° heat. I'm half the man I used to be. O'er root and shale, up hill and sand, through fields and forest. Blimey that was tough. Knocked the stuffing out of me a bit, but now I'm showered and changed and sat in the garden with a cold one (and Trish has just force fed me a big bowl of carbs saying something about my glycogen stores), I feel absolutely bloody marvelous. Not least of which because I no longer have to do any running. I'm in that lovely bit...

• Post #4145461

  Not saying I'm an overthinker but as I make dinner I've just sorted the order in which I would prioritise saving my coworkers in the apocalypse

• Post #4130450

  I refuse to start the week on a cross note, buuuut... there is a woman on the bus who's been having an animated telephone conversation with her friend on loudspeaker the whole journey. I don't wish her harm. I don't. But it's sort of fascinating that someone would choose to do that. It's so spectacularly rude and unaware. My brain is telling me that a reasonable response would be to go and sit in the seat right next to her and loudly make dolphin noises into her ear. I realis...

• Post #4121537

  I hate to do posts that seem like sort of humblebrags designed to cynically drive engagement. This isn't that. But.... this bears saying. I was in a situation yesterday - an all day training course - with a lot of people who are trying to make the world better. People at the cutting edge of social justice. As left wing as it gets. There was shouting, fists in the air and people referring to one another as comrade. All walks of life were in representation. But. In one of the exercises - a sce...

• Post #4108984

  Me, the only non-coder throughout the entire Fediverse, hanging with my Mastodon chums

• Post #4108982

• Post #4108213

  This is powerful. Thanks to @Akki@toot.lgbt for making me aware. 😊 :trans_heart: Thousands attend London Trans+ Pride 2026 march https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cvgv1v084j0o

• Post #4106840

  It beggars belief that Scotland is on fire (Scotland!) and yet people are still eating cows and covering fruit and vegetables in plastic

• Post #4097145

  This is apparently a 'tea tin' and I've been told to stop saying that 'grandad is in there'

• Post #4092387

  I've had an extremely weird day. I'm going to say it's the second weirdest day I've ever had. And I've had some very weird days.

• Post #4088001

  Forgot I was on the way to work yesterday morning where a woman on the bus played the same 5 second clip of a soap opera maybe 40 times? Out loud on her phone. I was nearly moved to say something. But then realised she might be dealing with something unseen. Something I couldn't imagine. And was living with a pain that could only be resolved by replaying a deeply annoying TV clip over and over again. Then we got off the bus and she was wearing this....