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• Post #4358966

  My last birthday present to myself is this shiny thing, which just arrived in the post from Blackwells. It’s sold out in a lot of places.

• Post #4337271

  Reminds me of when ex-Radio 1 DJ, #TOTP and Saturday Superstore presenter released “UKIP Calypso”, sung in a cod Jamaican accent. https://youtu.be/Br_RhjvZIrU

• Post #4335747

  A big red-tailed bumblebee. I don’t see so many of these around here. #bees

• Post #4335123

  Just now @CiaraNi@mastodon.green’s post about bridges reminded me about the London bus driver who jumped the gap in Tower Bridge as it was being raised, with a double decker full of passengers. He was given £10 and a day off. This is a wonderful caption. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cn7m8dmkglxo

• Post #4308962

  Happy Yorkshire Day! The original version of the Four Yorkshiremen sketch from At Last The 1948 Show, with its writers: Marty Feldman, Tim Brooke-Taylor, John Cleese and Graham Chapman. #YorkshireDay https://youtu.be/VKHFZBUTA4k

• Post #4286560

  I have run out of hot sauce, disastrously. The last couple of times I have just bought sriracha, and previous to that a sauce from Mr Vikki. Fedi! What hot sauce should I buy? Bonus points for being actually available in the UK and not something I have to fly to Portland, Oregon and ask a three-eyed hipster in an alley for, using a magic word. #AskFedi

• Post #4252563

  The famously landlocked Ivory Coast. Again, the AI doesn’t know what the fuck it’s doing but, more importantly, you’re too fucking ignorant to know that it’s completely wrong. #USpol https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/jul/30/government-map-mislabels-african-countries

• Post #4247394

  “Your feedback is important to us.” Then pay me. Also, fuck you.

• Post #4242376

  I like to lie on my arm until it’s numb before self-boosting, so it feels like someone else is doing it.

• Post #4198020

  LinkedIn has run into an iceberg and a massive cringe slick is seeping out of the hole in the hull.

• Post #4184668

  Bee on the fuchsia. #bees #Bloomscrolling

• Post #4166221

  I’m old enough to remember when John Cleese was a prominent supporter of the Liberal Democrats and not, er, Restore Britain.

• Post #4148356

  I had an avocado the other day which had the tiniest stone in it, the size of an almond. Well, apparently the universe was watching.

• Post #4142358

  Looking forward to Elon Musk being the first person to lose a trillion dollars. #Musk

• Post #4141092

  Guess I’m not able to listen to Culture Club any more. I’ll survive. https://www.euronews.com/culture/2026/07/27/nauseating-boy-george-faces-heated-backlash-for-new-pro-israel-song

• Post #4120904

  Fucked my ankle very painfully coming down the stairs with some boxes and, to be frank, I don’t feel that I am being offered sufficient sympathy on the domestic front. More of a cursory assessment that they’re not going to have the call the knacker’s yard just yet, and told to suck it up.

• Post #4094053

  Grey skies. Bit windy. Dare we dream of rain?

• Post #4086304

  Looking for stuff to do with the kids (zoos, farm parks, that sort of thing) and it would be nice for an adult and two kids to get into somewhere for less than £50, cheers.

• Post #4065929

  Thrilled to discover that the internet has decided Jimothy’s mum is called “Jimberly”.

• Post #4059722

  Just the UK’s actual Crown Prosecution Service using unchecked AI to cite fictional, hallucinated cases in an extradition case. cc @neil@mastodon.neilzone.co.uk https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/cps-apologises-cases-hallucinated-ai

• Post #4018243

  “We have always been at war with Feast Asia”

• Post #4017338

  The World’s Most Wankable Cities.

• Post #4007541

  When the reply starts with “Actually”

• Post #3992940

  I suggest you ask this question of, say, every British prime minister since the statelet was founded.

• Post #3977232

  I don’t think America is going to forgive Taylor Swift for this diarrhoea lettuce thing.

• Post #3970688

  RE: https://mastodon.social/@gwynnion/116954444714082687

• Post #3968932

  “Sure we immiserated everyone and killed the planet and diverted all the money from the poor to murderdrones, and also lost the next election to fascists, but at least we stuck to The Fiscal Rules”. #UKpol

• Post #3967942

  “Made in a Factory that also handles Milk, Wheat, Soya, Gluten, Barley, Celery, Mustard, Peanuts, Tree Nuts, Cat Hair, Shellfish, Asbestos, Cyclospora, Tapeworms and Weapons-Grade Plutonium.”

• Post #3967215

  I think that anyone who has been Home Secretary for 6 months needs to be forcibly retired to some pleasant pastoral facility in the countryside to cure their shrivelled souls, and never allowed near a position of responsibility again, beyond collecting eggs from the henhouse.

• Post #3965098

  “The City don’t want Ed Miliband to be Chancellor of the Exchequer because he believes that climate change is real, so we’ve given the job to a Furby smoking a cigar” #UKpol https://bylinetimes.com/2026/07/17/andy-burnham-making-shabana-mahmood-chancellor-would-resurrect-the-failed-politics-of-morgan-mcsweeney/