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• Post #4437676

  "What did you call it?" one of the biologists said. "Bob," said the boy. "He's my friend." "I doubt 'he' is the-" "Never mind pronouns," the other biologist said. "This a new form of life!" "Nonsense, it's clearly a fungi!" "Actually," Bob said, "I'm a cheese." "And my friend!" "Indeed." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4246666

  "Huh," said the dragon. "Would you care to explain?" "Yes, I'm not a princess all the time," said the milkmaid. "Only on bright spring days. Once they end, I turn back into me." "How come?" "Oh, I was bitten by a princess." "Again, how come?" "She couldn't help herself," the milkmaid grinned. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4174129

  ... users can be found giggling, crying, or simply staring into the distance saying "Whoah..." We spoke to one, and asked how they feel about warnings that the practice is addictive: "I could stop, but I don't want to." Some experts say if reading was invented today it would be banned at once. #TootFic #MicroFiction #SmallStories

• Post #4171107

  A bewildered stranger entered the castle kitchen. "Lost, sir?" the cook said. "You found a hidden door that led to the same room?" "Why, yes!" "How many times did you go through?" "Five or six, why?" "This used to be a wizard's castle. That door takes you through time, not space." #MicroFiction #TootFic #MicroFiction

• Post #4168415

  ** If you like what I do, you can support me on: Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/MicroSFF Ko-Fi - https://ko-fi.com/microsff Supporters get an annotated collection of stories once or twice per month. Or simply boost my stories so they find new readers, that is also super helpful! **

• Post #4141603

  "What is the deal with knights anyway?" the dragon asked. "What do you see in them?" "I was told," the maiden said, "that they're very fit thanks to all training. And that I should admire men who are good at violence." "Hm. And do you?" "What else is there?" "Hah! I'll let my princess tell you!" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4120499

  The message from the stars began with a sequence of numbers, but the rest took years to decode. Most was context to translate the message: "Those are the winning lottery numbers." The numbers matched the next draw after the message was first received. Now we received another sequence... #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4108198

  A spaceship landed in the park. A door dilated and a distraught alien emerged. "What's happened to the library? It's gone! The one thing your civilization had going-" "They moved to a new building," a passer-by said. "Don't you have ways of finding these things out?" "Yes. I ask at the library." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4099037

  "Excuse me," the man at the bar said, "but I couldn't help overhearing. Are you really saying you refuse to pick one?" "I don't see why I should have to." "It's a core part of one's identity!" "My gender and sexuality-" "Oh!" He looked relieved. "I thought you were talking about football teams." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #4038895

  "I'm bored," Zenon said. "Are we there yet?" "I told you," Odysseus growled, "to stop asking that." "Oh yeah? What are you going to do, somehow double the time we have left to go?" "Yes! Every time you ask! Just to spite you!" "Pfff. Are we there yet?" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3995353

  I noticed a neighbour had set up a little library box in their front yard. I checked the books and saw they were all jumbled up. I had only moved a few when a net fell on me. "Gotcha! Oh..." "What's going on?" I asked. "There's a feral librarian around." "Ah. Catch, tag, feed, release?" "Yup." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3989869

  I was waiting for my robot friend when a spell stranger came up to me. "Hi!" they said. "Um... hi?" "Oh, sorry." My phone pinged with a text from my friend: "Body's in for service, this is a loaner." "Oh!" I said. "Er... Is it nice?" "Can't wait to go back. This is..." "Not you?" "Not me." #MicroFiction #TootFic #Smallstories

• Post #3964234

  The sword master nodded. "I see. Well, I'm not one to back down from a challenge. And what type of sword are you most interested in learning to use?" "One of those long ones with the elaborate guard." "A rapier? In human size, or your size?" "Does it matter?" said the dragon. "A bit, yes." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3888545

  "What is your favourite part of your job?" the reporter asked. "That's a tough one," said the book. "For me, I would say being re-read." "Because it shows you were loved?" "No, you can feel that at a first read. It's that I can show more than the first time round." "It's more intimate?" "Yes." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3815305

  "Oh! Excuse me," I say as I feel the familiar tug, "I'm being summoned." I materialise in a pentagram in Hell. I glare at the demon. "I wish I'd never taught you how to reverse the ritual. I was at a party!" "We're out of salt liquorice." "Fine, I'll buy some tomorrow. Now send me back!" *poof* #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3789915

  "What is your wish?" the genie asked. "You know the story of King Midas?" "Ah! You want all you touch to become gold?" "Not gold, book." "Book?" "The object I hold will become the book I name." "I can get you a kindle and a credit card?" "I like paper books. Oh! And the author will be paid!" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3658384

  "What's the difference between witch magic and wizard magic?" "None," said the witch. "Magic is magic. The difference is how much you care about the cost." "There's a cost?" "Always." "What is the cost?" "The more you use, the more critters will shun you." "Critters?" "Cats, dogs... people." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3610642

  "Mum, look!" She ignited the fire by pointing at it. "Ah. You are a sorceress. I did wonder." "Why?" "You're the seventh daughter of a seventh daughter." "I don't have six sisters. Or aunts." "They died. Most children do." "Oh." "Now, what will you do?" "I'll make sure no child dies." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3565211

  Bouba woke with a start, her strong, round arms reaching out to grab a weapon. "You're safe. I healed you." A comforting voice. Bouba looked. A skinny witch, all angles, smiled at her. "Kiki?" "Long time no see. When did you get so hard?" The big warrior laughed. "When did you get so soft?" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3475560

  When the selkie returned to the beach, a man was holding her sealskin. "Is this yours?" he asked. "May I borrow it?" "You want to be a seal?" "No, but when I take it off, I'll be a woman, right?" "My heart, you already are," the selkie said. "That skin is mine, but I can help you find yours." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3444404

  "You have tampered in the Gods' domain!" the god shouted. "Well, maybe, but you gods tamper in the human domain all the time!" "That's... That's different!" "How?" "We are Gods! It's what we do!" "And we are human. Likewise." "I..." The god sighed. "Fair. But keep it quiet, okay?" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3408426

  A week after the teleport network had opened, it was already routine. Johnson stepped onto the plate and thought about the Bank Street station. He arrived at the leisure park. He complained to a guard, who said: "It takes you where you need to be." Behind him, his daughter's soccer game started. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3401537

  Dating is always a fraught issue for dragons. There is, of course, the question of hoard compatibility, but even that takes second place if both have a princess. "I do hope they get along," one dragon said. "Are they talking?" said the other. "Heads close togeth- Oh!" "They get along well!" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3390594

  The Superhero Academy officer looked from form to applicant. "You can predict when a cream pie will hit you?" "In two minutes." "OK. Wait in the next room." The officer looked at the next applicant. "You a mimic? You look just like-" "My twin." "Ah. Says here you can materialise cream pies?" #TootFic #MicroFiction #Superpowers

• Post #3353949

  On the eve of the summer solstice, I pick seven different flowers, in seven different fields, all in complete silence. I tie them into a bouquet and put it under my pillow. Doing so means that tonight, I will dream of my true love. I already live with her, but I like dreaming of her too. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories #MidsummerTradition

• Post #3340674

  You don't need much - a decent computer, layout software, a laser printer, and a basic time/space machine. I scour news sites for good news, then write them up, design my zine, print it out, and send copies to my subscribers, a month ago. Gives them a bit of hope, something to look forward to. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3334310

  The artificer pulled a lever. "It's active." The device looked like a doorway, a slight shimmer in the opening. The artificer stepped through. "Nothing happened," the apprentice said. "I already am who I am. If you step through, you'll turn into who you are." "May I?" "I built it for you." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3326152

  The shieldmaiden raised a tankard to the battered knight. "Dragon got the better of you? Told you." "I'd like to see you do better!" "Sure!" She emptied her tankard, rode out, and soon returned with the princess. "How?" "First, make sure the princess wants to be rescued-" "But-" "-by you." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3325031

  It was the world's first interspecies conference. "First," the elf said, "let's agree we all have a right to exist." The goblin nodded. The orc looked at elves and humans and growled "Nah!" The human looked at orcs and goblins and said "No." "For fucks sake," the elf and goblin said in unison. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

• Post #3300787

  ** Since it's come up: If you want to illustrate, animate, stage, or otherwise adapt one of my microstories, you have permission to do so as long as I am credited as the author, and it is non-commercial. (I love seeing those, if you're comfortable with showing me.) If one of my microstories inspires you to create your own story, in your own words, you don't need my permission - the story you create is yours to do what you want with. (Credit for inspiration is a courtesy, not a requ...