Post #3502035

I don’t have a reason to exist rn. Its pretty sad to realize that school was my reason for living for so long. Every now and again my illusions of grandeur reignite and I temporarily don’t feel hopeless. But then I remember who I am and feel hopeless again. I should try more to get a job XD but I find applying for jobs difficult and depressing. I probably should have stayed in school longer like everyone else but I felt like I was wasting time in school. I feel kind of cheated by university. What did I actually even learn? But it feels like I’m wasting even more time by not being in school. I keep imaging myself never ascending. Remaining unemployed and unpartnered and without purpose forever. All because I thought I was above doing coop or was too loyal to the newspaper or wasn’t direct enough with professors when I wanted research experience or made a small mistake in an interview or something. Smh.