Post #2110673

Figuring out I have an eating disorder has been such a trip. I'm feeling hungry right now, but I've discovered that I don't actually experience hunger (pretty common for ND folk to have terrible interoception). So I'm sat here thinking what is this feeling I'm calling hunger? Generally it's a desire for stimulation, and I've hit a bit of a wall in my favourite dopamine-game, Satisfactory, so that's a probably the real cause. But there's a chunk of my brain rifling through every food it can think of to try to convince me it would give me satisfaction if I ate that. But... I know it won't. Like even though this really feels like "hunger", I feel like all foods will not satisfy it. I'm not even in distress it's just kind of fascinating to watch these unconscious processes fighting. "hunger" vs "the unshakable sense that no food can satisfy me" I've done a good job of teaching myself that food is actually not a good source of dopamine, the high is way too short-lived, but I haven't taught myself to recognise "I need dopamine" as anything other than "hunger". ...I really need to get some ADHD meds don't I? All these mind games to cope with a lack of dopamine when I could just buy boxes of it.