Post #1649601

2026-03-26 18:27 UTC

@taedryn The invisible barrier with people who are allosexual is real. I feel that all the time. I always wondered why I could never be flirty in that way. Now I know. But it really was a weight lifted for me, and it absolutely was a consequence of my hormone profile changing. I'm pretty sure I was always ace spec, but the T dominance masked it.

Replies (1)

@taedryn@anarres.family 2026-03-26 18:35

@sophiesometimes I had this, for sure: I thought I was allo for a long time, switching to demi around the mid 2010s as I realized there was Something Going On, but not being sure what it was. After I switched to E, it became clear that T was driving my sexual behavior, for the most part. My body was into it, and my mind kind of never was. It explains an awful lot about my sex life in the past, which was occasionally quite active, but never had the draw so many other people seemed to experience. It also seemed to be very focused on fulfilling a body need, like needing to eat. I recall watching a Wes Anderson movie about a train ride, where two characters meet, have sex in a bathroom, and part ways, and thinking to myself "this must be a completely fictional thing." It was simply incomprehensible that such a thing could happen in reality. I felt the same way about one-night stands, but I've been assured they're a real thing. Of course, I ultimately realized that the entirety of my "sexual" attraction was actually just gender envy, which I still feel, but can clearly classify as a "want to be her" reaction now.

Open ##1649602