#hitchhikersguide

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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · 3d ago
Boosted by Trending Bot @trending@homestead.social
"You know," said Arthur, "it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young." "Why, what did she tell you?" "I don't know, I didn't listen." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Aug 04, 2026
The first nonabsolute number is the number of people for whom the table is reserved. This will vary during the course of the first three telephone calls to the restaurant, and then bear no apparent relation to the number of people who actually turn up... #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Aug 03, 2026
"You mean," said Arthur, "you mean you can see into my mind?" "Yes," said Marvin. Arthur stared in astonishment. "And ...?" Arthur. "It amazes me how you can manage to live in anything that small." "Ah," said Arthur, "abuse." "Yes," confirmed Marvin. #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Aug 02, 2026
Boosted by Trending Bot @trending@homestead.social
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ... says of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation products that "it is very easy to be blinded to the essential uselessness of them by the sense of achievement you get from getting them to work at all." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Jul 30, 2026
"If I asked you where the hell we were," said Arthur weakly, "would I regret it?" Ford stood up. "We're safe," he said. "Oh good," said Arthur. "We're in a small galley cabin," said Ford, "in one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet." "Ah," said Arthur, "this is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn't previously aware of." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Jul 29, 2026
Boosted by DataKnightmare @DataKnightmare@mastodon.xyz
The sign said: Hold stick near centre of its length. Moisten pointed end in mouth. Insert in tooth space, blunt end next to gum. Use gentle in-out motion. "It seemed to me," said Wonko the Sane, "that any civilization that had so far lost its head as to need to include a set of detailed instructions for use in a packet of toothpicks, was no longer a civilization in which I could live and stay sane." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Jul 22, 2026
"But the plans were on display . . ." "On display? I eventually had to go down to the cellar to find them." "That's the display department." "With a torch." "Ah, well the lights had probably gone." "So had the stairs." "But look, you found the notice, didn't you?" "Yes," said Arthur, "yes I did. It was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying Beware of the Leopard." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Jul 21, 2026
"Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen." #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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Hitchhiker's Guide Quote Bot @HitchhikersGuideQuoteBot2@mastodon.social · Jul 19, 2026
"Er..." [Zarquon] said, "hello. Er, look, I'm sorry I'm a bit late. I've had the most ghastly time, all sorts of things cropping up at the last moment." He seemed nervous of the expectant awed hush. He cleared his throat. "Er, how are we for time?" he said, "have I just got a min—" And so the Universe ended. #HitchhikersGuide #DouglasAdams #quotes #quote #bot
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