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  Most alchemists were nervous, in any case; it came from not knowing what the crucible of bubbling stuff they were experimenting with was going to do next. Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  There were a few seconds of total silence as everyone waited to see what would happen next. And then Nijel uttered the battle cry that Rincewind would never quite forget to the end of his life. "Erm," he said, "excuse me..." Terry Pratchett, Sourcery #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Nulli Sheilae sanguineae" Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "What's a philosopher ?" said Brutha. "Someone who's bright enough to find a job with no heavy lifting," said a voice in his head. Terry Pratchett, Small Gods #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  There have, in the course of decadent history, been many large wigs, often with build-in gewgaws to stop people having to look at boring hair all the time. There had been ones big enough to contain pet mice or clockwork ornaments. Mme Cupidor, mistress of Mad King Soup II, had one with a bird cage in it, but on special state occasions wore one containing a perpetual calendar, a floral clock and a take-away linguini shop. Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

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  Greebo's technique was unscientific and wouldn't have stood a chance against any decent swordmanship, but on his side was the fact that it is almost impossible to develop decent swordmanship when you seem to have run into a food mixer that is biting your ear off. Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Is that *you*?" said a female voice. It wasn't exactly an unpleasant one, but it had a sharp penetrating quality. It seemed to be saying that if you *weren't* you, then it was *your* fault. Johnny recognized it instantly. It was the voice of someone who dialled the wrong numbers and then complained that the phone was answered by people she didn't want to speak to. Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Bomb #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life." Terry Pratchett, Jingo #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  On Earth, No-one Can Hear You Say "Um". Terry Pratchett, Only You Can Save Mankind #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "ER...HO. HO. HO." Death makes a career move Terry Pratchett, Hogfather #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "I expect I've saved the day, right?" Gaspode the wonder dog Terry Pratchett, Moving Pictures #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care. Terry defending his solution to the Monty Hall problem. Terry Pratchett, alt.fan.pratchett #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Bigmac's brother was reliably believed to be in the job of moving video recorders around in an informal way. Terry Pratchett, Only You Can Save Mankind #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Probably the last man who knew how it worked had been tortured to death years before. Or as soon as it was installed. Killing the creator was a traditional method of patent protection. Terry Pratchett, Small Gods #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Sometimes I really think people ought to have to pass a *proper* exam before they're allowed to be parents. Not just the practical, I mean." Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "You can't trample infidels when you're a tortoise. I mean, all you could do is give them a meaningful look." Terry Pratchett, Small Gods #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  It would be nice to say that the tiny frogs thought long and hard about the new flower, about life in the old flower, about the need to explore, about the possibility that the world was bigger than a pool with petals around the edge. In fact, what they thought was: "._._.mipmip._._.mipmip._._.mipmip". Terry Pratchett, Wings #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Lancre operated on the feudal system, which was to say, everyone feuded all the time and handed on the fight to their descendants. Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Did any of them kids have some space alien with a face like a friendly turd in a bike basket?" Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Sometimes it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  - "What shall I do?" - "Well, if you see anything crawl out of the sea and try to breathe, you could try telling it not to bother." Rincewind and Eric at the Beginning of Time Terry Pratchett, Eric #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "Slave is an Ephebian word. In Om we have no word for slave," said Vorbis. "So I understand," said the Tyrant. "I imagine that fish have no word for water." Terry Pratchett, Small Gods #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "It's got three keyboards and a hundred extra knobs, including twelve with '?' on them." The Unseen University Organ, as designed by B. S. Johnson Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  The Emperor had all the qualifications for a corpse except, as it were, the most vital one. Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  [...] Vimes's grin was as funny as the one that moves very fast towards drowning men. And has a fin on top. Terry Pratchett, Jingo #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. Terry Pratchett, Diggers #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  They looked at one another in incomprehension, two minds driving opposite ways up a narrow street and waiting for the other man to reverse first. Terry Pratchett, Soul Music #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  Granddad was superstitious about books. He thought that if you had enough of them around, education leaked out, like radioactivity. Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  "When a man is tired of Ankh-Morpork, he is tired of ankle-deep slurry." Terry Pratchett, Mort #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld

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  SQUEAK. The Death of Rats Terry Pratchett, Small Gods #GNUTerryPratchett, #SpeakHisName, #Discworld