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• Post #4381015

  Technician: so usually this end is supposed to be cool and that end is supposed to be warm, but in your case it's the other way around Me: so we have heatpump? Technician *laughs*: no you have a broken AC

• Post #4359554

  Don't make Wittgenstein cry, please. https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/tls/vPt6gIgWBHlvDcIN6lvHg8CPLJE/

• Post #4358225

  The three energy levels of the cat atom, before excitement.

• Post #4262785

  If you told me ten years ago that one day I would get into online fights with economic Nobel price laureates, and that I would be the one looking sane in the exchange, I would have laughed out loud.

• Post #4245720

  LEAN was used to prove the Collatz conjecture. The proof exploited several vulnerabilities in the proving engine, and is not actually valid, which is par for the course for the Collatz conjecture, known exploit of the human mind.

• Post #4173451

  On the HAWK break: setting aside the LLM part of the narrative, this fits very well into my priors. I only had started looking at HAWK fairly recently and have not devoted much time to it, but when then I was not really convinced by the security argument. My main concern is that HAWK's public key is a global property, while any other module lattice based scheme only ever reveals local properties (Local/Global with respect to the number field order). Global properties contain much more usable...

• Post #4166656

  Why do 3mg of US melatonin absolutely knock me out to the point of being tired in the morning, while 3mg of European melanin, with the same jetleg time and direction barely keep me asleep until midnight. Both products claim to only contain 3mg of melatonin and pill filler, but the European variant is in a capsule and the US variant is not.

• Post #4102673

  I hate coming of airplane Wi-Fi to the news that there has been a terror attack on the pride parade in Berlin

• Post #4029599

  How to interpret a base64 encoded ML-DSA signature: first kilobyte: the exhausting part Second to last bytes: AAAAAAAAAAAA the eternal scream after being done with the exhausting part The last few bytes: the death rattle

• Post #4028749

  TLS session in half an hour. Can I have some pictures of cute kittens, to offset the cosmic balance?

• Post #4005086

  My wife: "the car went 4 miles per kWh" Me: "don't you mean 1.7 mm/J?

• Post #3950872

  Imagine falsely thinking something is an online poll, try to manipulate the outcome by getting your followers to "vote", still losing the "poll" by a decent margin, even though no organized counter campaign exists and overwhelmingly losing when the actual rules are applied as written, and calling foul play. That's essentially the non-technical version of the non-story of pure ML-KEM in TLS at IETF. (The technical story is that the stakes couldn't be lower with the d...

• Post #3939994

  Going to hotel bar, asking for dinner Host: dinner?!? Not football?!? Me: yes dinner. Food, for eating, please. Ah Vienna, never change.

• Post #3939295

  Ah, I see the pure ML-KEM LC has been resolved to the positive by the chairs while I was in the air. Brace for impact

• Post #3937047

  Newspaper: trump threatens tariffs due to Canadian wildfire smoke My jetlagged brain: I'm pretty sure the Canadians aren't charging for the smoke to begin with

• Post #3863095

  Imagine misquoting German phrases in public, to a German. Like what the hell is even happening here?!? https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/tls/ZHXO2T39xNb8Fg-QDqK5sjF7kww/

• Post #3795764

  Emma the Unflinching!

• Post #3750353

  Christianity is only valid modulo two

• Post #3681691

  Niche memes

• Post #3675500

  I don't get why anybody is listening to Jacob Applebaum. My cat has about the same expertise in cryptography, and has never been credibly accused of sexual abuse. She's also a lot cuter.

• Post #3607616

  I now get pestered by more djb minions on here being all like BuT WhAt If YoUr BaNk UsEd PuRe ML-KEM?!!)?!? Well, if my bank servers support this cipher exactly nothing happens. My client will still not offer it, so it will not be negotiated. And if it were to be negotiated then… also nothing would happen and my data would stay secure.

• Post #3545758

  I feel like "For all Mankind" is more and more just the prequel for the Expanse

• Post #3544998

  Things will get real fun when all these new TLS WG members realize that it is not, in fact, a vote. https://datatracker.ietf.org/doc/html/rfc7282#page-16

• Post #3528976

  Lol. LMFAO, even. Men literally count the number of times a woman uses the word "literally" in order to avoid going to ther^H^H^H looking at the content of a blog post. https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/tls/0KXcI7-afJC1hlDFs-Hy87BkRY8/

• Post #3497593

  I had this one sitting in my draft queue before I went on vacation, and forgot to hit publish. I hope nobody starved. So please enjoy my rant on hybrid signatures. https://keymaterial.net/2026/06/18/on-hybrid-signatures/

• Post #3494506

  *Opens the TLS WG inbox after three weeks OOO* *Closes the TLS WG inbox*

• Post #3493103

  The fact that three Supreme Court Justices were willing to throw it jus solis shows you how "conservative" they are.

• Post #3443898

  Me: I don't think we have lounge access. I mean you can ask, but they're going to be incredibly rude about it so I'm not going to @saraislet@infosec.exchange *asks* @saraislet@infosec.exchange is politely told no Me: 🤔 Me: … Me: oh! We're in Canada! That was rude for Canada! I was confused there for a bit.

• Post #3427348

  Me: what's up with all these goose memes? … … Me: Goose was not valued!

• Post #3408010

  The Deutsches Museum Thermometer has an out of bounds exception