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• Post #4245755

  She got a big cloaca so i call her Big Cloaca

• Post #4209438

  Tony Hawk's Pro Gesterone

• Post #3993912

  [To my sons on the family farm] weed em and reap, boys

• Post #3946465

  Rage Against the Claw Machine

• Post #3945249

  you better believe i keep that obelisk on me in case i gotta fulfill a mfers Prophecy

• Post #3821688

  Im not gay but 20 XP is 20 XP

• Post #3720910

  Give me everything you got for this :gkpink_w: ide :gkpink_a: shley :gkpink_p: ile

• Post #3583495

  Today could be the day trump dies!!! Everyone gather your spirit energy and focus "trump will die on national tv in 104 degree heat trying to give a speech'

• Post #3420440

  I guess they just couldnt resist the siren song

• Post #2539674

  Naughty girls go into the oubliette >:)

• Post #2505426

  Been noticing that most psychics these days are either really despondent or kinda concerningly manic. Its been tough trying to find a happy medium

• Post #2093531

  Cut off from oil, americas power grid collapses. Millions suddenly face starvation within months. There seems to be no source of food, but wait! Its americas pot farmers, who pollinate a crop of weed plants and make enough hemp seeds to feed the american underclass on hemp gruel

• Post #2093530

  I try to keep my name at the top of the unresolved reports sections of the mod tools so i can fondly remember all the people that malded at me over the years

• Post #2093529

  Bees are so neat like theyre so good at making and protecting a home and storing up nutrients that never go bad inside it that the biggest threat to them is a bear eating their honey

• Post #2093527

  Me: flirting with girls on cinco de mayo You: flirting with girls with a link in their bio

• Post #1889144

  Life is short and hard, you deserve a treat. Get yourself that ice cream, throw that lit cigarette butt out your car window. Youve earned it queen 👑

• Post #1804327

  Couples T-shirt idea: one shirt says "the devil" and the other says "the details"

• Post #1787875

  You were gonna use your phone to do something important but you got distracted and opened mastodon. What was that thing you were supposed to do? 🤔🤔

• Post #1786560

  oops my wife has already walked in on me and my gf making out on the couch 🤭 :shrek2:

• Post #1786559

  Im just a heckin pupperino...you wouldnt hurt a heckin pupperino would you? Im just a smol blep heckin pupperino with glasses on her birthday 🥺🥺

• Post #1756027

  Ok ive beated everything but the jokerless challenge on #balatro how tf do you win jokerless ive never made it past ante 4

• Post #1553228

  My transition officially started when i got this heated seat bidet 5 years ago. One cannot be a princess without a princess throne

• Post #1524704

  Hot optimistic take: the rise of puppygirls has to do with the maturing of the trans communitys ability to provide support for each other. What is a dog without her pack

• Post #1460208

  Its time to smoke weed

• Post #1460207

  Happy #420 i made a veg sausage egg and cheese on eggo to celebrate and also bc im eally high

• Post #1443664

  Its 420 in high af in bed and my cat is resting on my shoulder. Does she like weed smoke? She didnt run when i blew smoke near her (her head was in the window)

• Post #1410041

  now i aint sayin she a woims digger

• Post #1341621

  If youre reading this it is now Floor Time. Put down your phone and lie down on the floor for at least 30 seconds Boost to make other people have floor time

• Post #983478

  Hey where do i buy a trans pride flag thats not amazon or some other massive corp

• Post #927983

  Its called the 'aux' because listening to music is 'aux'ilirating