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• Post #4479186

  A woman was rude to me on the train today, so I Googled the title of the book she was reading and told her who the murderer was.

• Post #3475421

  Is this what Simon and Garfunkel meant?

• Post #2987652

  How do I remove a previously established filter in Mona app on the iPhone?

• Post #2987651

  Thought I’d give the Apple battery 80% limit setting a try on my M3 MacBook Air in preference to using Al dente Pro (Setapp). Nope. Bloody useless. Battery had got to 56% charged, incoming charge wattage was barely 5 W. This was regardless of whether I used the standard 70W charger or a ^%W GaN charger. Optimise battery is turned off. I noticed that if I logged out of the user account then back in, the 80% limit setting had reverted to 100%. The same applied to rebooting. This is not supposed to...

• Post #2987650

  With my trusty Ryobi cutting tool I’ve been reducing about a dozen Amazon cardboard boxes to flat-pack form.

• Post #2987649

  Quote by a forest ranger at Yosemite National Park on why it is hard to design the perfect garbage bin to keep bears from breaking into it: "There is considerable overlap between the intelligence of the smartest bears and the dumbest tourists."

• Post #2987648

  Erwin Schrödinger admitted defeat after his cat smugly proved that the box both exists and does not exist at the same time, whether observed or not. Then later went on to prove that furballs have zero mass.

• Post #2987647

  If you love someone, set them free. If you hate someone, set them free. Basically set everyone free and get a dog. People are stupid.

• Post #2987646

  Just watched a video showing a built from original blueprints Case 150 steam tractor aka road locomotive. Its engine makes 150 hp and 8000 foot-pounds of torque at 200 rpm. That’s virtually the same power as my car but the tractor has over 54 times the torque. My car makes its peak torque at 4000 rpm, 20 time the speed of the tractor.

• Post #2987645

  All mushrooms are edible but some only once. Remember to leave a piece on the kitchen counter for the Coroner.

• Post #2987644

  Canadian teens have made a version of Monopoly in a pentagonal shape and called it “American Dictator.” It retails for CD $50 with a proportion of the profits going to a local food bank. One of the spaces is called Supreme Justice. If you land on that you can buy the Justice and over-rule any other player’s move. Game cards are called “Questionable Decisions,” each one being an actual Trump decision. Unfortunately all stock has been sold out.

• Post #2987643

  When I said I wanted to be mysterious and fascinating, I didn't mean medically.

• Post #2987642

  I run a tight shipwreck.

• Post #2358225

  Apologies for the grainy image.

• Post #2098515

  "What's the difference between a vegan and a computer programmer? One is disgusted by a rack of lamb and the other is disgusted by a lack of RAM."

• Post #2010488

  If you were expecting a Star Wars joke from me on May the 4th then you were looking in Alderaan places…

• Post #1124637

  I tried that Japanese decluttering trend where you hold each thing you own and throw it out if it doesn't give you joy. So far I've thrown out all the vegetables and the electricity bill.

• Post #1029465

  I was making soup last night and the recipe called for 5 potatoes cubed. 125 potatoes seems a bit excessive, doesn't it?

• Post #695977

  Because of the fuel crisis and rising transport costs, supermarkets are now placing long-term limits on the amount of essentials one person can purchase... • Coles: 2 packs of pasta, 1 pack of toilet paper (max 24 rolls), 1 bottle of cooking oil. • Woolworths: 2 packs of pasta, 2 packs of toilet paper (max 24 rolls), 1 bottle of cooking oil. • Aldi: 2 trumpets, 1 diving suit, 1 MIG welder, and 2 plastic meerkats.

• Post #625963

  I have 20 litres of unleaded petrol, looking to swap for a 4 bedroom house with a pool.

• Post #302725

  Biologists have recently produced immortal frogs by removing their vocal cords. Now they can't croak.