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helplessduck

helplessduck@mastodon.online

<p>I was once called the terror that quacks in the night and I&#39;m damn proud of it.<br />Mortal enemies: commas, typos, bigotry, fascism, asymmetry, ultra-processed foods. <br />Call me: He/Him/Michael/Arrogant Jackass.<br />No particular order. </p><p>Follow me for clever tricks, miserable advice, and pedantic tomfoolery. </p><p>If I post about politics, I assiduously tag with USPol.</p><p>Header Image: Black box.<br />Avatar: Adobe Firefly generated golden duck on a pond with a castle in the background.</p>

Posts

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    Big day for wolf pairs.

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    Yesterday it was bears. Albeit, bears that need rehab.

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    Eew. Bob Vila shills for Home Depot now? Gross. Should have stuck to slinging grass seed after Martha Stewart ate Sears or whatever.

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    Once again I am headed to the capital today.

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    &amp;#39;Tis the way, Kevin. &amp;#39;Tis the only way.

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    @MissConstrue Darker than the inside of a dog. There&amp;#39;s milk at the house but the fridge ain&amp;#39;t runnin&amp;#39;. Lord and butter. Lord and Taylor (I think this is a clothing brand, but I say it.) Duhfilduh bubs (daffodils). ...It&amp;#39;s because you asked that this is all I&amp;#39;ve got. This should go on for days.

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    You gotta hit it like it owes you money.

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    @MissConstrue TIght as ticks, him and Tom-Ed though.

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    @Kierkegaanks In people years or dog years?

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    If I weren&amp;#39;t profoundly mentally unwell, I&amp;#39;d make an okay hotelier.

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    Literal literary terrorist. All day. The Damn Cat has been at the bookshelves all damn day.