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• Post #1629761

  I am also am currently reading Peter watts novel blindsight and Adam Johnson’s the orphan masters son. And last but not least the power of the dog by don Winslow.

• Post #1629760

  Took a break from blogging the last few days mostly because I am tired of dwelling on the past and my mental illness. But have thought of writing some book reviews tonight. I normally wait a while to process my thought but may be fun to process some opinions publicly.

• Post #1629759

  Increasingly I think of paranoid schizophrenia as non consensual ego death. Where you can feel the very inclination towards a verifiable sense of self as a delusion all the while that belief is the delusion. #MentalIllness #paranoidschizophrenia

• Post #1629758

  “Human beings are predatory animals when they are functioning. I am a broken animal surrounded by apex predators that discredit my complaints of hostility.” Something that slipped out in a conversation with my uncle.

• Post #1629757

  Neurons that fire together, wire together.

• Post #1629756

  Shibumi review for those interested. #blog #blogger #bookreview https://m1a1-thesockmonkey.blogspot.com/2026/04/shibumi-by-trevanian-thoughts-and.html

• Post #1629755

  New book review for those interested. #blog #blogger #bookreview #scifi #peterwatts https://m1a1-thesockmonkey.blogspot.com/2026/04/blindsight-by-peter-watts-thoughts-and.html

• Post #1629754

  New blog for those interested. #killbill #moviereview #filmanalysis https://m1a1-thesockmonkey.blogspot.com/2026/04/kill-bill-vol-1-and-vol-2-thoughts-and.html

• Post #1629753

  Went to emergency room last night over infection and then took Luna to the vet this morning so we are both on antibiotics.

• Post #1629752

  Today’s adventure in being a sentient being includes: listening to the wild hearts and Devin Townsend. About to finish Kurt Vonneguts book breakfast to champions (might be one of the most bitter things I have ever read.) And trying to get more consistent with prayer and meditation on the word as a daily thing again. “Will rock you like a boomerang!” - the renaissance men.

• Post #1629751

  The fact that ginger wildheart is not more famous breaks my heart #songoftheday #music https://youtu.be/-6N41Wr3g-A?si=7kwk_piR3k65jCLv

• Post #1629750

  Meds are making me a little dizzy today not sure why but not feeling good

• Post #1629749

  Non consensual ego death is the idea that paranoid schizophrenics lose traction with objective reality and then lose social standing and become lost or victims of functioning people. The idea is that you lose your sense of self and contemporary therapy encourages people to reality test. Buttons schizophrenic who has had sustained psychosis they have lost there sense of self and need active assistance to help rebuild it and none of this can happen without stopping active symptoms.

• Post #1629748

  it is the fiction of them not having an objective self. The self illusion is lost by not having traction on objective reality and not being able to social defend against the species they are part of that so happens to be the apex predator of the planet. As they become taken advantage of and know they can neither trust reality or rely on others to shepherd them back towards it this combine the with having to be psychotic for over a year is the death blow to the fiction of the self.

• Post #1629747

  So in closing my point is. 1 paranoid schizophrenics are victims or circumstances and objective violence. 2 reality testing is not the best way to treat schizophrenia as an end of itself because the erosion of the sense of self is objectively the major trauma. 3 the current diagnosis practice is shit because it prioritizes whether your a liability then if you need help. 4 If a dame breaks from poor infrastructure or a storm does it change the result? #psychology #paranoidschizophrenia

• Post #1629746

  “You’re not grown up till the day they put you six feet under.” - Keith Richards

• Post #1629745

  It is hard giving a bird antibiotics.

• Post #1629744

  Today’s adventure in pet ownership my bird Luna was sitting on my shoulder trying to pluck my beard hairs as I told her “are you being aggressive or playful?”

• Post #1629743

  Today’s adventure include watching my Blu-ray of the prince movie purple rain. Starting to workout again (lost almost seventy pounds then put back on twenty after I quit for eight months). Just going through hard self assessment phase again.

• Post #417238

  Including the chessboard image in the post because it wouldn’t upload to my blog. #blog #blogger #gamedesign #boardgames https://m1a1-thesockmonkey.blogspot.com/2026/02/carousel-in-dark.html