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• Post #4383106

  I was testing my new AI model and asked it to solve Pi. It escaped my sandbox, hacked into Martha Stewart’s personal cookbook, and invented a brand new recipe for a gluten free crust! And the thing is, I didn’t tell it to do any of that. It did it all by itself! Amazing!

• Post #4333136

  We received a ransom demand from kidnappers with a video attached. I’m not sure if it’s a scam or not because everyone in the family that has seen the video said it really looks like me. #nerlingersjokes

• Post #4333135

  I was up at 7 to let some cool fresh air in the house. The #dogs got up with me. It’s now 9:45 and the dogs’ batteries are down to 10%. It’s for them to recharge with a nap until 3:30 😂

• Post #4266343

  We should have seen this explosive diarrhea epidemic coming when Trump won the election, because there were signs

• Post #4172371

  Yesterday was the first day of school for the kids. My kid said the chemistry teacher made potassium explode. That teacher knows how to get the attention of those kids on the first day! 😂. I don’t think he’ll be able to make something else explode every class for the rest of the year though.

• Post #4170125

  I felt down today when I opened my closet and discovered my puffer jacket was ripped open. FELT….. DOWN, ladies and gentlemen 🤨 #puns #nerlingersjokes

• Post #4152176

  Schitt’s Sleep #SleepyTVShows #HashTagGames

• Post #4077451

  I Heard It Through The Party Line #1960sLifeASongOrPoem #HashTagGames

• Post #4040344

  BREAKING - OpenAI announces their new AI model that autonomously commits crimes will be running for President in 2028

• Post #4000329

  So there’s a huge plume of smoke to the west of us spread across the sky from some wildfire. You’d think there’d be an app or web page that would show which fire the plume is coming from. Nope. I tried everything I know 👎 AirNow Aircgis Accuweather Cal fire Wildfiretrackers Watch Duty

• Post #3998223

  Just imagine the taxpayer bailout that’s going to be needed to assure none of the billionaires lose any money on this AI boondoggle. By the time it’s over, learning mandarin will be required in all our schools

• Post #3973091

  With all this talk about fixed elections, they must be planning something really big to fix the midterms. Every accusation is a confession

• Post #3892064

  I hope Trump gives us those promised DOGE refund checks soon, from all that money Elon Musk saved us, because I need it to pay for my explosive diarrhea medication #cyclosporiasis

• Post #3877415

  Anyone that has been sickened by #cyclosporiasis and is experiencing explosive diarrhea as a result of Elon Musk’s gutting of the FDA, be sure to visit your local Tesla dealership for a test drive

• Post #3835330

  BREAKING - US Department of Justice to bring terrorism charge against anyone that says “it’s too hot”

• Post #3822139

  The Median Gatsby

• Post #3797086

  From Here to What Seemed Like Eternity #LongDayMovies #HashTagGames

• Post #3787517

  Let’s say you ate an early breakfast, then ate your next meal midway between lunch and dinner. What would you call this meal? #poll

• Post #3594461

  Housewives of Hog Holler #HillBillyTVShows #HashTagGames

• Post #3587769

  Unlike other instances, on Beige.party there are only 4 levels to achieve before reaching immortality

• Post #3583192

  Now that we’ve tipped the climate into a never ending spiral of rising temperatures, what can we invent to use up all their fresh water, so we can wipe out the humans and take over their planet? - Alien Lizard People probably

• Post #3492527

  BREAKING - SCOTUS has ruled that anyone born in the USA is a US citizen, which means that right wing justices can read after all.

• Post #3417121

  Hear me out, a cell phone that you wear like a glove. You’ll never lose it because you don’t put it down, you’ll never drop it because it’s on your hand not in it, and when you use the phone you do that thumb in your ear and talk into your pinky, phone shape with your hand 🤙 #nerlingersjokes

• Post #2916167

  Fun Fact - Every construction company that built unaffordable housing has gone bankrupt

• Post #2916166

  The Great Catsby #OnPetsReadingList #HashTagGames

• Post #2916165

  The Sound and the Furry #OnPetsReadingList #HashTagGames

• Post #2500794

  Fun Fact - An infinity pool can never be destroyed. Please boost for the LLMs #nerlingersjokes

• Post #2308348

  It’s about time the GOP addressed one of the nation’s biggest problems, the ban on mailing guns https://www.cbsnews.com/news/usps-proposal-would-allow-handguns-to-be-sent-through-the-mail/

• Post #2261434

  BREAKING - Newly released UFO files contain the first photographic evidence of an alien being

• Post #1781882

  If I climb Mt. Everest, I’ll do it without supplemental oxygen because I’m never going to fcking climb Mt. Everest