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  People need to start appreciating the effort I put into not being a serial killer.

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  Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

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  In Star Trek people often complain that replicated food is not as good as naturally produced food, which is weird when replicators are presumably using the same technology as transporters, which can perfectly replicate Spock every time. But is Spock getting less flavoursome over time? In this essay I shall…

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  Don't make me regret letting you merge.

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  What's the correct ratio of gunpowder to essential oils? I want this bath bomb to be perfect.

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  I’ve faced way more peer pressure to eat protein in adulthood than I did to take drugs as a teen.

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  My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achille's elbow.

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  Life is too short to remove USB safely.

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  There’ s no “I ” in team, but there are three in narcissistic and they’re all quite handsome.

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  Please stop raising awareness. There is too much. I have become too aware.

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  For I was hungry, and you voted against the school lunch program that provided me my only meal of the day; I was thirsty and you voted against clean water legislation; a stranger and you deported me without due process to an infamous prison in El Salvador.

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