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• Post #4431907

  The alarm bells that went off in my head when I read this in a Robert Louis Stevenson novel

• Post #4431906

  What idiot named the duo Simon & Garfunkel and not Paul Art: Mall Cop 2

• Post #4431905

  Had this tender spot on my temple and was like "damn must be one of those deep-rooted pimples you can't see" Forgot that in the middle of the night I managed to eat shit while in the safe confines of my bed by bashing my head against the end table while rolling over

• Post #4431904

  I ain't sayin she a woim digger

• Post #4431903

  Stop saying "bone dry" bones are wet they're always wet they've got your goop on them always until you die and then for a long time after that and then you put them in a soup and they're wet again and

• Post #4431902

  What's the most extreme gap between an artist's best and worst album that you know? I'm listening to Mardi Gras by CCR right now and it's gotta be a top conteder

• Post #4431901

  hell is putting a bra on at 7:30 in the morning to be available for an appointment with someone who had an entire five hour window to hit and couldn't even do that

• Post #4431900

  Sure Ryan Gosling's pretty good at acting but imo he peaked at making somber/spooky ghost music https://youtu.be/WfRMjiVoaQ8

• Post #4431899

  once my mycelium network finds out about this it's over for you losers

• Post #4380439

  "Everything is idealised on social media" not true. I regularly have mental breakdowns on the tl, get on my level babes 💅💁🤳

• Post #3763397

  People only ever say "it's like a Hitchcock film" when there's a lot of birds around, but not when someone is being a nosy neighbor or is really dizzy

• Post #1889137

  Returned to the scene of the crime after SLURPING my SOUP 😤😤😤

• Post #1786562

  (Sean Connery voice) We named the *horse* Jortsiana

• Post #320133

  Have seen at least half a dozen horse-related posts today but did not twig it might be lunar new year related until now because that's just how the jorts timeline usually looks