Mind Shambles

Aspiedan@autistics.life

He/him/his, autistic parent, Quaker, lecturer & Discworld enthusiast now in his 40's. Lifelong battler with mental health issues, & struggle with adapting to a world with flexible ethics & morals. Ally of LGBTQ+, disabilities, cultures, & hater of those who tout freedom of speech but use it to victimise & abuse. Avatar is a white sketch on black page of a male, with shirt, & head made up of scribbles (how I feel most days). I write poetry as therapy sometimes. <a href="https://allpoetry.com/Northfield" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener" translate="no">https://allpoetry.com/Northfield</a>

Posts

Post #4413695
@alicemcalicepants@ohai.social Just stumbled across a new (to me) group. Only an EP so far but really good, straight on my #BandcampFriday list for tomorrow, and thought you might like: https://themanateesofficial.bandcamp.com/album/different-state-of-mind-ep
Post #4033446
Quakers in Britain have called on the new Prime Minister Andy Burnham to place peace, equality and climate justice at the centre of his government's policies. https://www.quaker.org.uk/news-and-events/news/prioritise-peace-equality-and-climate-justice-quakers-urge-andy-burnham @BritishQuakers@mstdn.social
Post #2452281
Do we still have the power, to turn the world upside down? Is it worth stepping into the firing line, risking the internet&#39;s ire, for taking a stand? Is it really ok to sit it out, leaving it, to someone else, somewhere, sometime or other? Or would your heart crumble, piece by tiny piece, slowly becoming dust to be blown away by the wind, eroded, slowly, until all that was left, would be a heart shaped hole, where love and happiness used to glow? Don&#39;t let that be the future. Reg...
Post #1919766
Just finished my first job interview in 11 years. I am a bit overwhelmed to be honest. It was all so positive, but now I have to wait. There are so many factors, and I need a dark room and music for a bit. #overwhelmed #actuallyautistic
Post #1919765
Sat, in a morning haze of sun through streaky windows. Cup of tea sat, empty and sad on the table in front of me. My thoughts sound muted, like hearing them from beneath bath water, tinny and far off. A mix of suspense, layered with confusion, hope and worry bound tight. A glance at the clock, prompts the putting on of shoes, ready for town with the boy. And so, on with the day. #poetry #MixedFeelings #morning
Post #1919764
2 tracks from my bandcamp Friday purchases yesterday, Very different, but fit nicely/poignantly in my life right now. The Rowdie track especially chimes a chord with the cliche &#39;I don&#39;t fit in&#39;, which is annoyingly less cliche and more &#39;life&#39; being #actuallyautistic and being a prevelant feeling today. https://rowdie-rosie.bandcamp.com/album/rowdies-half-tall-tales-and-tell-tales?t=1 https://mouthulcers.bandcamp.com/track/prevail-2 #BandcampFriday #musi...
Post #1846127
Yesterday was lost amongst a host of jobs and errands. Taking a moment to digest all the thoughts from the Quaker meeting brought back the key theme for me. Conflict, be it global, national, personal or even family, is easy. It takes no effort. No listening, no understanding, no empathising. Peace is hard because it takes effort. Time to listen, self-reflection, compromise. But the benefits of peace always outweigh those of conflict..Time spent focusing on being peaceful and good, preventing and...
Post #1762199
A quote for a birthday. The great Sir Terry Pratchett. Creator of worlds, master of satire, friend to the weird &amp; different. You are missed! &quot;Through the fathomless deeps of space swims the star turtle Great A’Tuin, bearing on its back the four giant elephants who carry on their shoulders the mass of the Discworld. A tiny sun and moon spin around them, on a complicated orbit to induce seasons, so probably nowhere else in the multiverse is it sometimes necessary for an elephant...
Post #1558877
The glamour of grief Grief, clings to you, like the sticky weed you threw as a kid. It builds up, slowly dragging on you. Sometimes, it&#39;s only when you realise who or what has died, that you realise that weight, is grief. Sadness, leaking in to your every day, leaching out your colours, leaving a pale grey husk. And at that moment, as the melancholic glamour falls, you can breath, and realise that its already gone. Finally realised that amongst the stress at work, the sleepless nights...
Post #1558876
It seems that the history currently being written, is somewhat similar to that of the original Crusades, with differing religions seemingly using different books, all based on older originals, to justify actions as good and righteous. Amazing how little humanity learns over hundreds of years reading the same books. I think I would like to refer all sides to another book, slightly newer, but just as &#39;booky&#39; (has pages and words, just like the others). One by Sir Terry Pratchett (...
Post #1558875
After reaching a turning point and grieving for what my job used to be, and applying for new jobs, I got an interview. Very different role from US corporate data within manufacturing, to . . . A lecturer at a college. Now, just an interview consisting of a 15 minute &#39;Micro-teach&#39; session on a related subject in front of an interview panel, in 1.5 weeks to do. I am nervous but in a positive way, compared to constant anxiety and sadness in my current situation. Whatever the future...
Post #871634
Interesting meeting today at my local Quaker meeting house. I was contemplating mindfullness in response to someones thoughts on being in the present moment, and my struggles doing just that. My favorite Terry Pratchett quote (and my fedi-header) came to my mind: &quot;Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has got there first, and is waiting for it&quot;. Today I saw this quote from a new point of view. Whe...