@zer0unplanned do you need some good suicide tips? you don't have to keep being in this world either if you don't want to (i'm being facetious).. you went through a lot more than i would have been able to.. that sounds like a hard life that you had to navigate through and it's kind of miraculous that you are still here and every thing.. even though other people go through struggles much worse than mine though it still doesn't really help my own situation out much.. my situation isn't nearly as bad as all the stuff you've had to make it through, but i still just feel tired and done with this life.. i don't want to live to 80 or 70 or 60 or even 50.. i'll be fine once i'm in spirit world, and won't be suffering any longer.. it's the humans still left on this planet that have to keep suffering.. it's not really a fun world to be in for most people..