Post #4283527

New newsletter post! :boost_please: :reply_love: "Solar Autumn + Full Moon: Fertility reexamined" It's Friday, and on this particular Friday I have been married for fifteen years, and tomorrow comes the holiday that my owner and I mark as Calan Awst, but which many of you may call Lughnasadh or Lammas. As the observance of the grain harvest and a celebration of other first fruits, it is a day in which fertility rites naturally come to the fore, but less as a matter of hope and sacrifice like we witness in the spring or summer, and more a matter of thanksgiving for what the earth has gifted us — and of reckoning how much we can now carry with us into the ever-looming darker half of the year. What was sown shall be reaped, and we honor it. Because of what I have endeavored to reap from my own womb for more than a decade, and because of how near I draw to that moment, I think now is an important time for me to take stock of what I have bodily endured, paying respect to the agonies of earlier attempts but acknowledging that mostly I no longer ought to grapple with the spectre of barrenness; I am instead awakening to the equal challenge of living as two-in-one beings. First in that most uncanny mammalian way, then whenever I release my burden into the wider world and remain forever responsible-yet-not for its own life and doings. Since — as I have already warned readers a few times — this process lately been reshaping my very mind and thus for at least a little while I find my writing is strongest in a fully creative rather than analytical mode, the meditations I offer today are not strung together in a deliberate order, and various ideas may present themselves through vignettes. There is not one central thesis. My words are an untranslated transmission of what stands on the threshold of the veil. *A content warning applies throughout this piece for clinical infertility, miscarriage, pregnancy termination, forced birth, right-wing/patriarchal pronatalism, and everything remotely in that realm.* https://salt-for-the-eclipse.ghost.io/solar-autumn-full-moon-fertility-reexamined/