Post #3447999

I don't suspect a lot of the people I'm connected to here need this reminder, but just in case: "yes" is consent. Anything else: "maybe" or "umm" or "I guess" are not consent. They mean NO. "Yes" based on incomplete or inaccurate information is not informed consent, and thus not consent. "Yes" given under duress, while intoxicated, or under any kind of threat, no matter how insubstantial it may seem to you, is not consent. "Yes" given after the fact is consent for what happens after yes is given. Whatever happened before that did not have consent. The very best consent is enthusiastic: "Hell yes, I'm super into that," "I'd love to receive your newsletter once a week," "I absolutely want to trade my soul for superhuman violin skills," things of this nature. But if you don't have at least "yes" from the individual then it's not consent. An organization cannot consent for its members.¹ This applies to: Fedi servicesEmployment²Interpersonal interactionsAnything that impacts another person's autonomy In addition, consent can be revoked at any time, for any reason, or no reason. Consent to one thing does not equal consent to something else. If you don't have a clear "yes" (whether verbal or gesture or web form or other means of clearly communicating "yes") then the answer is NO. Today's lesson brought to you by a thoroughly exhausting back and forth with a tech bro who really really doesn't get it. ¹ Technically, an organization can set up a legal framework whereby blanket consent can be offered by members to the org, who can then consent for the members. This is not a trustworthy practice, it leads to horrible abuses of power. Big ol red flag. ² But it's effectively unenforceable for employers, unfortunately, at least in the US.