Post #2972635

2023-05-02 17:13 UTC

Several months ago, a number of the LGBTQIA+ community here in the Fediverse, shared coming out stories. I've always felt sharing our story is important. We feel less alone when we learn others had a similar experience. Recently I went looking for that thread, and sadly it is gone, victim to a number of instance migrations. I am going to share mine again, using the hashtag #ComingOutStories. If you are able, consider sharing whatever parts of your experience you can. I find it very therapeutic to put it all in words. My Coming Out Story Up until a few months ago, I had only told a few people my coming out story. I now understand how important it is to share our experiences. Anyone reading these will realize they aren’t alone. I’ve always been smaller than others my age. Add red hair, freckles and glasses, I was a bully’s favorite target. My bullying was extreme, often physical and much more than unkind teasing or simply being stuffed in a locker. My home life was equally troubled. My father was abusive to my mother and us kids. There was no support system for me at such a young age. Seeking help from adults always made retaliation even worse. Early on, I sensed I was different. Clearly my classmates did as well. And so it continued. My freshman year of high school, some football players grabbed me, took me into a bathroom and beat me to the point an ambulance was needed. Their excuse was “he’s a faggot.” My family home was on a hill, in front of our High School. (See attached photographs). The weekend after I was hospitalized, someone burned the word “FAG” into the grass on the back of the hill behind our house - facing directly into the front of the high school. The humiliation I endured from the entire community, seeing that word burnt onto our property every day, was worse than the broken bones, stitches and bruises. And so I was outed. My father never spoke to me again, which wasn’t a big deal, given how physically abusive he was. Sadly my mother is one of the worst bigots I know. MAGA-style bigotry. To this day, she does not understand why it is racist to have a "plantation" motif in her kitchen, complete with "lawn jockey" and Aunt Jemima style figurines everywhere. She thinks "religion can fix the sin of homosexuality." I frequently considered running away over the years. But I had three younger siblings who relied on me, especially when our father went into a rage. I left that town after graduation, joined the Navy and rarely go back. My support and love now come from friends and found family met along the way in the years since. And my life is all the better for it.

Replies (15)

@MPgh@mastodon.world 2023-05-24 18:54

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through all that. Sending you great big hugs. One of the things that sticks out for me is how torn you were between wanting and needing to leave home but wanting to stay to protect your siblings. Some of us are here despite our parents. I’m so glad you came through it a stronger person. You’re a good man. Thanks for speaking from the heart.

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@Krisss@mastodon.nl 2023-05-11 23:27

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Bryan this is so powerful that you share this story. I am sorry to read what you have endured 🙏 I don't know you very well, but from what I see you are an amazing and beautiful person and I am proud to have you as my Masto friend 💜

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@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone 2023-05-11 22:58

⬆️ One more #ThrowbackThursday as an update to my #ComingOutStories (above). Sometime in early 1980s. We raised chickens and ducks. Here's photos taken with my first camera, a birthday gift from grandma. Included here because in one of the photos, the High School can be seen below, from top of the hill, behind the house I grew up in.

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@strange_new_words@tenforward.social 2023-05-08 12:30

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone My mom taught in that town in the ‘70s. She had the children of the grand dragon of the KKK in class. One day one of them twisted the head off a live chicken and let it run around the school bus to terrorize the other kids. The school librarian was a lesbian woman. One day she outed herself to a friend who turned her in to the school principal. She only barely kept her job by going to therapy and convincing the therapist to tell the school district she was cured. I’ve never been there but it sounds like a real hell hole. If you hadn’t been gay, you might never have left.

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@Earth2Ben@tenforward.social 2023-05-05 01:52

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Powerful story. Best wishes, prayers, thoughts and wishes for good friends as you navigate through life.

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@johnb48@mastodon.online 2023-05-04 05:12

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Bryan, It broke my heart the first time you posted this. And it breaks it again. I wish I was close enough to come over and throw my arms around you and hug you for about a half an hour. In new of that I can just say that my love is with you, my friend.

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@MacropodCare@mastodon.au 2023-05-04 03:28

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone I'm s sending you a shopping kangaroo named Kooma. He is a bliss filled boy. He hugs my rainbow side deeply. Life is full of things that it shouldn't be. Fuck up fathers, moron mothers, dumb arsed jocks and the list goes on. I usually seek ways to put shit on them 20 years later and it has often worked.

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@msquebanh@mastodon.sdf.org 2023-05-03 00:06

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone ❤❤❤❤

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@cobie@connectified.com 2023-05-02 20:05

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone thank you for sharing your story.

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@StanWonn@mstdn.social 2023-05-02 19:45

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Glad that you were able to make it through all of that! And like a lot of us, you had to build your own family and did so successfully.

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@thefalcon@tech.lgbt 2023-05-02 19:33

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone :blobcathug:

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@tvdean@mstdn.social 2023-05-02 18:27

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Thanks for sharing your story, Bryan. I'm glad that you are here to tell it 🫂♥️

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@SunnJax@tech.lgbt 2023-05-02 17:43

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Thank you for sharing your story and the invitation to share ours. 💜

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@traviedean@tech.lgbt 2023-05-02 17:31

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone thank you for sharing, Bryan. You’re always so sweet and kind and I’m happy you’re here sharing yourself with us! 🫂💛

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@PapaBear@4bear.com 2023-05-02 17:26

@RiversideBryan@blahaj.zone Thank you for sharing that Bryan ❤️

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