i cannot go anywhere alone - including any setting in which there will be an encounter with healthcare professionals, mental health professionals, social workers, veterinarians, law enforcement, lawyers, anyone selling a car or other larger item (i.e. appliances) even if they’re generally cool to most people, my affective presence seems to immediately trigger unhinged hostility and at the same time, they recognize social death, that i am no one to nobody, no one will intervene on my behalf or otherwise give a rip about what happens to me.