Post #1565143
2026-03-29 21:58 UTC
You'll have to get hold of that part of you that can identify with the scapegoat and then describe it sincerely. I think that's where the exploration between them and I usually begins. The amazing thing is that I often learn something and end up getting corrective feedback about myself. If you go into this kind of situation with the assumption that it is only the other person who needs to learn something, you're kind of scapegoating them ("they're the whole problem").
Replies (1)
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@malte@radikal.social 2026-03-29 22:01
The scapegoat by definition gets to carry too much responsibility - in fact, all the responsibility - for the problem that is making the person upset. By going in and offering myself up as the part of the problem, I often find that I get to learn something. Which is very different from thinking that you're somehow helping the situation by sacrificing yourself (a very different way of identifying with the scapegoat that is strong in the Christian tradition).