Post #1537903

@enby_of_the_apocalypse @Zahlenzauberin yes, my whole damned life I thought everybody also hates it so much they would willingly sell their souls to devil to be free from this. And people in my family was like "yes, it's awful but it's a fate and nothing could be done about it". It didn't help in my family I had opinion of "always exaggerating person". Never thought about dysphoria because didn't know about enby identities and not clearly feeling like a man meant to me I couldn't be trans. (As a result my negative feelings evolved into more vague "I hate being human", " I hate having body" and wishing death to this body and being just free soul.) You are right about thing which shouldn't exist. For me one of worst things is being forced to think about it. Damn, my whole life I not fully consciously tried to get it out of my mind as often as possible (most of my personality is made of dissociaton and maladaptive daydreaming). Huh, and for some reason I always felt strong need to cover menstrual products, sneaking secretly to bathroom like it was doing something wrong and shameful.