Post #1257668

coming back to ffxiv this past week has been hard bc i feel the weight of other people’s expectations of me still even though ive given up leading my fc and forked over the discord reigns. ostensibly, ownership transferred to someone else when our owner had a lapse in sub and me coming back, nobody wants to “bother me” with the “burden” of running the fc (it’s not a burden when i’m allowed to do what i want but i’ve been tasked with being nice to every single new person they bring in and just accepting them and i simply do not trust people that quickly.) also one of the people taking over is someone i’ve never liked, but they said “love you” to me last night when i got done handing over the details & ownership for the discord and it made me feel so gross like. you don’t know me. i’ve never liked you but i show you the base amount of respect but over and over again people act overly familiar and affectionate in game with me and i hate it. idk if im just cranky or what but like…they wanna start recruiting people and growing the fc and that’s the antithesis of what i formed this fc on and it’s making me nauseous dealing with all of this. there are people i like left there but my core group of friends up and left for aether dc after i stopped playing 2 years ago. i dont get it this keeps happening to me - some types of people just feel way closer and more comfortable with me than i do with them and i feel like i cannot open up to them. and i dont even want to so like. aaaaaaaughhhh idk what to do im so conflicted